- From: Sandro Hawke <sandro@w3.org>
- Date: Tue, 28 Feb 2012 07:16:03 -0500
- To: Chimezie Ogbuji <chimezie@gmail.com>
- Cc: Birte Glimm <birte.glimm@uni-ulm.de>, SPARQL Working Group <public-rdf-dawg@w3.org>
On Tue, 2012-02-28 at 02:27 -0500, Chimezie Ogbuji wrote: > Thanks for the review, I have incorporated changes from these > suggestions (along with changes to the abstract from Sandro from later > in this thread). See below. Looks okay to me. (It still obviously has the problem with how one finds the graph store URI -- we're making a big mistake here -- but I'm not going to fight for that any more.) -- Sandro > On Mon, Feb 6, 2012 at 2:47 PM, Birte Glimm <birte.glimm@uni-ulm.de> wrote: > > Change summary: Does this really just describe the changes since last > > pub? I had the impression that the title of the document changed quite > > some time ago, but I didn't check this. > > This has been updated to better reflect recent changes since earlier > publication. > > > Sec.1: I didn't get the second sentence and how the enumeration items > > are constraints. > > I have added a clarifying sentence after the list to better describe > how they are constraints and how they are met. > > > Sec. 3: There is an extra space before the full stop of the second sentence. > > Fixed > > > Fig. 1&2: The figures are hard to read on a b/w printout since only > > the yellow/orange colour is really different from the others. Although > > most people will read on the screen, it might be helpful to use > > dashed/dotted lines or more distinct colours even when printed b/w. > > Fig.1 has a legend, but Fig. 2 does not. > > Figure 2 is meant to use the same legend as in figure 1. I have added > this to the label of Fig. 2. > > In general, I do not really > > understand how to read the diagrams. It is difficult to see where to > > start reading. I somehow expected something that illustrates the flow > > of sending a GET request and how this leads to the identification of a > > relevant set of triples/a graph, but somehow I can't see that in the > > Figures. > > I have added a short clarifying sentence for both figures: "Requests > to an implementation of this protocol receive HTTP requests using one > of the HTTP methods that is directed at some RDF graph content. Above > the arrows indicating the request is the relevant HTTP methods and > below is any message body content or additional headers that accompany > the request. At the head of the arrows leaving RDF graph content is > the message body for the corresponding response" > > > In several places sentences start with "So, ...", which is not good > > style (at least I learned that). For example, in the two paragraphs > > following Fig. 2. > > I have replaced all sentences that begin this way. > > > Paragraph before 5.1: to the manipulation af RDF graph content: s/af/of/ > > Changed > > > Sec. 5.1: involving a*n* RDF payload > > Changed > > > Sec. 5.2.1: returned from dereferencing a*n* IRI (I think so) > > Why does the paragraph end in a semicolon? > > Both changed. > > > Sec. 5.3: "and using the with an IRI" does not make sense > > Changed to "is empty and there is sufficient authorization to create a > new named graph using the IRI used in the request IRI" > > > Paragraph before 5.5: The response codes were usually set in > > typewriter, but 202 (accepted) is not > > Changed > > > Sec. 5.5: contains "Networked-manipulable Graph Store" although the > > change summary said that this term is replaced with just "Graph Store" > > Fixed. > > -- Chime > >
Received on Tuesday, 28 February 2012 12:16:15 UTC