[CSSWG][css-text-3] CSS3 Text Last Call Working Draft

Hi.
I have not read all of your document (http://www.w3.org/TR/css-text-3/ ), but have a few proofreading comments (most concerned with sentences that in English normally take the present indicative, sentences that describe a fact or habitual action, what we call the "scientific or habitual present" I think).

2.1 Example 3 Discussion final paragraph

"Text transformation happens after white space processing, which means that ‘full-width’ transforms only preserved U+0020 spaces to U+3000. "
{ COMMENT: use the habitual/scientific present with "preserved" here, not the past tense; also I am confused by "only preserve U+0020 spaces to U+3000" -- do you mean that one of these is transformed into the other? Sorry to not be that familiar with what text transformation does. }
=>

"Text transformation happens after white space processing, which means that ‘full-width’ transforms only preserve?? U+0020 spaces to U+3000. "

4. 1rst paragraph
" CSS white space processing allows the author to control interpretation of such formatting: to preserve or collapse it away when rendering the document."

{ COMMENT: I would not use a colon after "formatting" but rather would use a comma. }

=>
" CSS white space processing allows the author to control interpretation of such formatting, to preserve or collapse it away when rendering the document."

4. 3rd paragraph

"CSS does not define document segmentation rules. Segments could be separated by a particular newline seqence (such as a line feed or CRLF pair), or delimited by some other mechanism, such as the SGML RECORD-START and RECORD-END tokens. "

{ COMMENT: "could" is not the right tense in English; again use the habitual or scientific present of the verb; that is, use "can" here instead of "could."}

=>
"CSS does not define document segmentation rules. Segments can be separated by a particular newline seqence (such as a line feed or CRLF pair), or delimited by some other mechanism, such as the SGML RECORD-START and RECORD-END tokens. "

4.1.1. Example 4

"where the <ltr> element represents a left-to-right embedding and the <rtl> element represents a right-to-left embedding. If the ‘white-space’ property is set to ‘normal’, the white-space processing model would result in the following:

    The space before the B ( ) would collapse with the space after the A ( ).
    The space before the C ( ) would collapse with the space after the B ( ).
This would leave two spaces, one after the A in the left-to-right embedding level, and one after the B in the right-to-left embedding level. This is then ordered according to the Unicode bidirectional algorithm, with the end result being:  "

{ COMMENT: what you have is o.k., but with 'if . . . is . . . ' it is customary to use the future indicative for the 'then' clause; you have "[i]f the 'white-space' property is set to 'normal',"
following this it is customary to use the future tense, that is to use "will" instead of "would."
Later again, if you change these to the future,  use the habitual/scientific present, "leaves," instead of "would leave." Also, perhaps because I am a southerner, I would say "[a]ll this is then ordered" instead of "[t]his is then ordered" (for clarity).}
=>
"where the <ltr> element represents a left-to-right embedding and the <rtl> element represents a right-to-left embedding. If the ‘white-space’ property is set to ‘normal’, the white-space processing model would result in the following:
    The space before the B ( ) will collapse with the space after the A ( ).
    The space before the C ( ) will collapse with the space after the B ( ).
This leaves two spaces, one after the A in the left-to-right embedding level, and one after the B in the right-to-left embedding level. All this is then ordered according to the Unicode bidirectional algorithm, with the end result being:  "

(I'll try to proofread the rest of this later today. I do not believe I will have comments on the content.)

--Best,

--C. E. Whitehead
cewcathar@hotmail.com