- From: Steven Rowat <steven_rowat@sunshine.net>
- Date: Sun, 11 Aug 2019 11:48:08 -0700
- To: Markus Sabadello <markus@danubetech.com>, W3C Credentials CG <public-credentials@w3.org>
On 2019-08-10 2:02 pm, Markus Sabadello wrote: ...> 1. Created a static copy of the DID Spec Final Community Group Report > here: > https://w3c-ccg.github.io/did-spec/CGFR/2019-08-10/ ... > In that case, I think the next step is for everyone to review, and for > the W3C CCG Chairs to publish the CGFR. > > Markus Greetings, and my comments on the above CGFR DIDs v0.13 page: Great work! Overall seems fully comprehensible. Only three niggles that slowed/confused my reading: In Section “4.7 Fragment”: Is the following possibly meant as an Issue, that should be in pink background? : “It is desirable that we enable tree-based…” If not, I think it should be recast into the passive voice, since the use of “we” is unsettling; before this point I believe all grammar has been in the passive voice (except for one previous pink “Issue” that contains “we”). Plus that sentence “It is desirable that we…” is long and convoluted and I find it difficult to follow, so maybe best if it is also recast into two or more sentences? In Section “5.10 Extensibility”: — Uses “we" and "us”; again different from the rest of the document. — Less terse writing than the rest of the document to this point; more like a marketing section; ie., uses what appear to be strictly unnecessary phrases like “a simple matter of” and “developers are urged to”. I believe it would be more in keeping with the rest if this section was rewritten slightly more tightly, and fully passive voice. In Section “6.2 JSON-LD”: — I believe the term “syntactic sugars” is unnecessarily rare (I had to look it up) for the widest possible readership. It also seems unnecessary given the explanation of the paragraph it is set in. I suggest changing to: “The most noteworthy [of these] provided by JSON-LD are:...” Plus niggling niggle: in Section 2 Period missing after “...previous transaction” ... That’s all… :-) Steven
Received on Sunday, 11 August 2019 18:48:29 UTC