proposed editorial changes (front matter and guideline 1.1)

1. In "How to read this document" update "Top layer..." [0] to reflect 
changes if the principles proposal [1] is adopted.  Also update number of 
guidelines listed in point #3 (currently says 19, but we've decreased 
number recently)
[0] <http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#how-to>
[1] <http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/w3c-wai-gl/2004JanMar/0361.html>

Overview of Design Principles [1.5] needs to be updated per proposal.
[1.5]  <http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#overview-design-principles>

2. 2. Technology-specific Checklists
last sentence 1st paragraph says, "These documents will provide information 
on what is required when using different technologies in order to meet the 
WCAG 2.0 Working Draft access guidelines."
delete "access guidelines" at end of sentence to read:
"These documents will provide information on what is required when using 
different technologies in order to meet the WCAG 2.0 Working Draft."

3. all instances of "working draft" need to be capitalized

4. Scope
2nd sentence, 1st paragraph says [2], "They include recommendations to make 
pages accessible and usable by people with a full range of disabilities. "
replace "pages" with "content"
"They include recommendations to make content accessible and usable by 
people with a full range of disabilities. "
in general, replace "page" with content.
[2] <http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#scope>

5. Priorities and Techniques
[3] In general, this section needs to be tightened up. The paragraphs don't 
flow and feel like they have been pasted together from different parts of 
the document.  I will propose a rewrite to the list that cleans up this 
section w/out altering the meaning.
[3] <http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#priorities-techs>

6. Conformance
[4]  Editorial note says, "As we publish this Working Draft of WCAG 2.0, 
the WCAG WG is in the midst of significantly changing the conformance 
scheme from previous drafts."
I don't want to scare people too badly, suggest, "There are several open 
issues with the proposed conformance scheme. This section outlines the 
conformance scheme used throughout this document. Issues are outlined at XX 
(link to bugzilla issues list related to conformance?). Feedback, comments, 
and proposals are encouraged."

It says, "uidelines are divided into three categories of success criterion:"
replace "criterion" with "criteria"

It says, "Level 1 Success criterion:"
replace "criterion" with "criteria"  (do for each level)

Conformance claims:  points 4 and 5 say, " have ben met."  replace "ben" 
with "been"

Point 5 either needs to have an editorial note or needs to be deleted since 
I have not found evidence that the group seriously considered this as an 
option.

[4] <http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#conformance>

7. Overview of Desing Principles
says, " For example, people who are temporarily operating under constrained 
conditions like operating in a noisy environment where they can not hear 
well at all,"
should be "well or at all"

8. User Needs
The first two bullet points have modifying phrases that don't apply to the 
correct subject.  Need to be cleaned up. Don't have good suggestion right now.
<http://www.w3.org/WAI/GL/WCAG20/#user-needs>

This section only mentions a screen reader as an example of an assistive 
technology. Propose that we either add other examples or delete screen 
reader. Concerned that by only mentioning screen reader we further the myth 
that we are only addressing issues for people who are blind or have low vision.

9. Guideline 1.1
Benefit #2 needs to be rewritten to fix odd modifiers.
Example #2 should not refer to "data themselves" should delete "themselves"

Times up for making comments...
--w

-- 
wendy a chisholm
world wide web consortium
web accessibility initiative
http://www.w3.org/WAI/
/--

Received on Thursday, 26 February 2004 15:03:29 UTC