One suggestion: the date should be given in the first two paragraphs, without having to click through one of the links. As you mention later, people might be in the area for reasons other than the Fronteers conference, and these people won't automatically know what date is the day before the conference starts! Other than that, I think Eliot's edits create a clear and informative description without losing Paul's friendly tone. Amelia On 4 September 2014 10:44, Eliot Graff <Eliot.Graff@microsoft.com> wrote: > Hi Paul. > > > > This looks great. And it’s very exciting (Oh, how I wish I could be > there….) > > > > I did a not-so-light edit. J > > > > It’s attached as a Word doc (let me know if you need another format). > Please take or reject suggestions as you see fit. > > > > Also, I am hoping to get final confirmation today or tomorrow about which > Microsoft rep will attend to help. > > > > Eliot > > > > *From:* Julee Burdekin [mailto:julee@adobe.com] > *Sent:* Thursday, September 4, 2014 9:35 AM > *To:* Paul Verbeek; public-webplatform@w3.org > *Subject:* Re: Blog post doc sprint Amsterdam > > > > So cool, Paul. I did a light copyedit. J > > > > ------------------- > > Julee Burdekin > > Content Strategist > > Adobe Web Platform > > @adobejulee > > julee@adobe.com > > > > *From: *Paul Verbeek <verbeek.p@gmail.com> > *Date: *Thursday, September 4, 2014 at 5:32 AM > *To: *WebPlatform Public List <public-webplatform@w3.org> > *Subject: *Blog post doc sprint Amsterdam > *Resent-From: *WebPlatform Public List <public-webplatform@w3.org> > *Resent-Date: *Thursday, September 4, 2014 at 5:33 AM > > > > Hi all! > > > > I wrote up a blog post for the doc sprint next month: > http://blog.webplatform.org/?p=1045&preview=true > > > > Could you take a quick look and give me improvements. > > > > Thanks! > > > > Cheers, > > Paul > > > > >Received on Thursday, 4 September 2014 18:39:29 UTC
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