- From: Curt Tilmes <Curt.Tilmes@nasa.gov>
- Date: Thu, 5 Apr 2012 10:47:04 -0400
- To: <public-prov-wg@w3.org>
On 04/02/2012 05:25 PM, Luc Moreau wrote:
> *PROV-DM:*
> http://dvcs.w3.org/hg/prov/raw-file/default/model/releases/ED-prov-dm-20120402/prov-dm.html
> issues to be raised against http://www.w3.org/2011/prov/track/issues/331
Some minor notes, typos, wording suggestions, etc.
I'll address the review questions separately.
Curt
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
General:
I probably missed some discussion about this, but the '-' placeholder
for missing optional arguments is inconsistently used in the PROV-N
examples. Is it always required? I don't really care for it in
optional arguments where the argument mapping is unambiguous,
particularly at the beginning or end of the argument list.
The examples also seem to inconsistently use the prov defined types,
e.g. prov:Person, prov:Collection, etc.
For example,
[prov:type="Collection"]
vs.
[prov:type="prov:Collection" %% xsd:QName]
Is there a real distinction between these we should be highlighting,
or should we be using them the same way in the various examples?
Abstract
--------
"PROV-DM, the PROV data model, is a data model for
provenance that describes the entities, people and activities involved
in producing a piece of data or thing."
Why not use the term 'agents' instead of people in the first
sentence?
"actities"
typo
"Second, to be able to provide examples of provenance, a notation is
used for expressing instances of PROV-DM for human consumption; the
syntactic details of this notation are also kept in a separate
document."
This seems awkwardly worded to me. Here's a stab at a revision,
perhaps someone could reword it even better:
Second, a separate document describes a provenance notation used for
expressing instances of provenance for human consumption. It is used
in examples in this document.
Status of This Document
-----------------------
"...a set of specifications aiming to define the various aspects..."
be optimistic! we will hit our aim!
...a set of specifications that define various aspects...
or even
...a set of specifications defining various aspects...
The specifications are as follows.
If it is acceptable style, I would end that with a colon, as
follows:
In the list of documents, some end with , some . and some ; I
would do them all the same way.
The primer is the entry point to PROV offering a pedagogical
presentation of the provenance model.
"offering an introduction to the provenance model."
...separating the data model, from its contraints, and the notation
used to illustrate it.
remove commas:
...separating the data model from its contraints and the notation
used to illustrate it.
The PROV-DM release is synchronized with the release of the PROV-O,
PROV-PRIMER, PROV-N, PROV-DM-CONSTRAINTS documents.
add "and" between last two
We are now making clear what the entry path to the PROV family of
specifications is.
We are now clarifying the entry path to the PROV family of
specifications.
1. Introduction
---------------
...with extra-descriptions that help...
extraneous -?
...introduction to the PROV data model by overviewing a set of concepts...
...introduction to the PROV data model with an overview of concepts...
2.1 Entity and Activity
-----------------------
...over a triple store, and editing a file.
change 'and' to 'or'
2.2 Generation, Usage, Derivation
---------------------------------
In some case, the consumption...
some cases
2.3 Agents and Other Types of Entities
--------------------------------------
Three types of agents are recognized because they are commonly
encountered in applications making data and documents available on the
Web: persons, software agents, and organizations.
Should those three be bolded here? Maybe not since we aren't
really defining them and they are just special defined types?
...member of the collections.
of the collection.
This concept allows for the provenance of the collection, but also of
its constituents to be expressed.
This concept allows for the provenance of the collection itself to
be expressed in addition to that of the constituents.
Such a notion of collection corresponds to a wide variety of concrete
data structures, such as a maps, dictionaries, or associative arrays.
I'm not certain I would describe this is as a "wide variety" -- I
think of those as pretty much the same thing...
Perhaps just "Such a notion of collection corresponds to concrete
data structures such as a maps, dictionaries, or associative arrays."?
2.5 Simplified Overview Diagram
-------------------------------
I would add a sentence somewhere in here about Agent being an Entity.
Maybe here:
...how they relate to each other. At this stage...
...how they relate to each other. Note that each agent is also an
entity, so the entity relationships can also apply to agents. At
this stage...
2.6 PROV-N: The Provenance Notation
-----------------------------------
PROV-N is a notation that is designed to write instances...
PROV-N is a notation for writing instances...
...a series of arguments in bracket.
...a series of arguments in brackets.
(actually, I usually call them parentheses, but either is fine.)
The bulleted list here has inconsistent spacing between bulleted
items.
...which always occur in first position...
...which always occurs in the first position...
...which occur in last position...
...which occurs in the last position...
actually, I would probably just take out the 'occur' and word it
like this:
Most expressions have an identifier in the first position, and an
optional set of attribute-value pairs in the last position,
delimited by square brackets.
3.1 The Process View
--------------------
...some of which locating archived email messages, available to...
...some of which refer to archived email messages available only
to...
..illustrate them with the PROV-N notation, a notation for PROV-DM
aimed at human consumption.
I would eliminate the explanation and just say
...illustrate them with the PROV-N notation.
4. PROV-DM Types and Relations
...derivations and its derivation subtypes.
remove 'its':
...derivations and derivation subtypes.
...somehow referring to a same thing.
referring to the same thing.
4.1 Component 1: Entities and Activities
----------------------------------------
...and their inter-relations...
...and their interrelations...
Figure figure-component1 overviews the first component, with two "UML
classes" and binary associations between them.
Figure figure-component1 uses UML to depict the first component with
two classes and binary associations between them.
(If you reword this figure description, make the other figure
descriptions match, if not, don't :-)
Associations are not just binary; indeed, Usage, Generation, Start,
End are remarkable because they have time attributes, which are
placeholders for time information related to provenance.
Associations are not just binary; indeed, Usage, Generation, Start,
End also include time attributes.
4.1.3 Generation
----------------
...state the existence of two generations (with respective times
2001-10-26T21:32:52 and 2001-10-26T10:00:00), at which new entities,
identified by e1 and e2, are created by an activity, identified by a1.
...describe the generation of new entitities e1 and e2 by activity
a1 at respective times 2001-10-26T21:32:52 and 2001-10-26T10:00:00.
4.1.4 Usage
-----------
...state that the activity identified by a1 used two entities
identified by e1 and e2, at times...
...state that activity a1 used entities e1 and e2 at times...
4.3 Component 3: Derivations
----------------------------
see figure note on 4.1 above -- I don't like the verb "overviews".
I also wouldn't say
So-called "UML association classes" are used...
Just say
UML association classes are used...
4.3.1 Derivation
----------------
The reason for optional information such as activity, generation, and
usage to be linked to derivations is to aid analysis of provenance and
to facilitate provenance-based reproducibility.
Optional information such as activity, generation, and usage can be
linked to derivations to aid analysis of provenance and to
facilitate provenance-based reproducibility.
...it was passed as, if the activity...
replace , with 'or'
4.5 Component 5: Collections
----------------------------
In many applications, it is also of interest to be able to express the
provenance of the collection itself...
Many applications also need to express the provenance of the
collection itself...
4.7.4.4 prov:type
-----------------
include Collection and EmptyCollection here?
======================================================================
Received on Thursday, 5 April 2012 14:47:38 UTC