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Comments on WICD WD 2005-08-09

From: Dominique HazaŽl-Massieux <dom@w3.org>
Date: Wed, 24 Aug 2005 10:48:27 +0200
To: public-cdf@w3.org
Message-Id: <1124873308.5986.145.camel@stratustier>
Hi,

A quick editorial comment on the first draft of WICD:
The abstract is too long; as the Manual of Style suggests [1], it should
be "a few paragraphs at most [..] that summarizes what the document is
about [...] for a non-technical audience"; specifically, I would
suggest:
        - the current explanation of the sections should be moved into
        the introduction
        - rewording the 1st paragraph to make it easier to grasp for a
        non-techy audience, for example:
                The combination of multiple markup formats such as
                XHTML, SVG, SMIL and XForms in a single document raises
                specific problems not addressed by the individual
                specifications. This specification defines two sets of
                rules that allows a good integration of these formats
                into compound documents in a mobile context and in a
                larger.

Dom

1. http://www.w3.org/2001/06/manual/#Abstract
-- 
Dominique HazaŽl-Massieux - http://www.w3.org/People/Dom/
W3C/ERCIM
mailto:dom@w3.org


Received on Wednesday, 24 August 2005 08:48:43 GMT

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