HTML5's Offline-first Council of Trent

I was going to post this as a reply to #844
<https://github.com/slightlyoff/ServiceWorker/issues/844> (*) but this
topic is a far greater and more of an all-encompassing issue than any
single thread can serve.

We (all HTML5 Web-App developers) desperately need a schism from the
heretical forces of "Offline First" and the Spartan, austere, featureless
world, of Web-App minimalism!

If you want to hamstring yourselves and live a primitive
pre-telecommunications lifestyle, or something more akin to life post
Road-Warrior Apocalypse, then good for you; just stop white-anting people
who wish to take full advantage of modern technology!

For most "cashed-up" consumers, Lack of Connectivity is the exception an
NOT the norm. (And I live in the most isolated capital city in the world so
cop that!) Sure we'll failback and degrade gracefully but we WILL NOT
target the bean-tins-and-string deployment option.

Your Client-Based GeoFences are a joke :-( Your willingness, nay
preference, to serve up stale, outdated data, is an exercise in
self-flagellation that only a fellow sicko could understand.

But let us wicked technologists not sway you from your
life-was-meant-to-be-hard, God-would've-given-us-wings fanaticism. All we
want is a fair share of the Chrome, Mozilla, Opera, and Safari development
budgets for expanding the Feature List rather than censoring it.


(*) The reason I was quoting that thread is that it used to contain the
following: -


 > Although we're using a timeout, this approach still suffers from being
online-first. A better approach is offline-first
https://jakearchibald.com/2014/offline-cookbook/#cache-then-network
Drives me absolutely insane :-(