- From: Sebastian Rudolph <rudolph@kit.edu>
- Date: Thu, 5 Jul 2012 19:44:29 +0100
- To: Bob DuCharme <bob@snee.com>
- Cc: public-owl-comments@w3.org
Dear Bob, Thanks for reporting these issues and the careful proofreading. Based on your suggestions we have made a few amendments in [1]; the diff is [2]. [1] http://www.w3.org/2007/OWL/wiki/Primer [2] http://www.w3.org/2007/OWL/wiki/index.php?title=Primer&diff=26391&oldid=26390 Please let me know in case this does not address your concerns. Regards, Sebastian Rudolph on behalf of the W3C OWL Working Group > Overall it's very good, and I learned a lot. I'm suggesting potential > areas for improvement here, most of which are just picky copy-editing > things that will count as editorial errata. Sorry that it's coming so > long after the Recommendation, but I figured that it was better late > than never. > > thanks, > > Bob DuCharme > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > > In the Abstract: "...should be read before other OWL 2 documents" would > be better off referring to "other documents describing OWL 2" because > section 8.2 provides a very specific meaning for the term "OWL document" > that doesn't fit with the wording here. > > Section 4.3 word usage problem "it can be excluded that there is an > individual" (did it mean "it can be inferred"?) > > 4.8 word usage problem "and via their relatedness to other individuals" > (and via their relationships) > > 5.2 word usage problem "are allowed to by kind of self-referential" If > this means "be kind of self-referential," that's a little better, but > don't say "kind of"--either it's self-referential or it's not. > > 5.2 word usage problem "hasChild is class member of any class" hasChild > is *a* class member of any class? > > 5.3 word usage problem "we can say something about all respectively at > least one of somebody's children" > > 8.2 "and also can use XML entities for namespaces." To be correct, it's > actually using entity references, not entities, for namespace prefixes, > and it's important to be correct here because it looks like "entity" has > a very specific meaning in OWL 2 (e.g. in the section right after this > one, "8.3 Entity Declarations") that has nothing to do with the concept > of XML entities. In fact, the use of XML entity references in this > document is confusing and adds nothing to the document or to the sample > ontology. I realize that they're used to provide flexibility in which > prefix represents which URL, but doing so in this document sacrifices > some simplicity that a Primer should not sacrifice. It would be better > to remove them all and just say rdfs: instead of &rdfs; (etc.) throughout. > > 10 word usage problem "By and large, different profiles can be > distinguished syntactically with there being inclusion relations between > various profiles." (with the use of inclusion relations between various > profiles?) > _________________________________________________ PD Dr. Sebastian Rudolph senior researcher & project leader at AIFB Karlsruhe Institute of Technology (KIT) rudolph@kit.edu phone +49 721 608 - 47362 www.sebastian-rudolph.de fax +49 721 608 - 45998
Received on Friday, 6 July 2012 07:49:08 UTC