Summary of COGA review of EOWG videos

Hi, EO folks, kudos on getting this project so close to the finish line!
Due to the incredibly quick turnaround request, COGA did not have time for
the full team to review, but below are all the comments I put in the Frame
files. Please note that I also created a Github issue
<> to underscore
the concerns from multiple team members about the Ian video, thanks.
Cognitive, Learning, and Neurological Disabilities


   *Title and title voiceover: *The word “Neurological” needs to be removed
   from the title. It should be “Cognitive and Learning Disabilities," which
   reflects the COGA feedback that EO had incorporated in the first sequence
   in EO's revised script

   *Last sentence: *The closed caption is missing the last part of the
   url—the narrator says “slash people” but the closed caption ends the url
   after “WAI.”

*Ian, data scientist with autism*


   *0:09: This video's stereotyping of an awkward white male with autism is
   very concerning.* At a minimum, show Ian saying “Hello, I’m Ian” rather
   than having him stare blankly at the camera without talking while we hear
   his narrated voice say “Hello, I’m Ian.” This needs to be fixed.

   *0:49: This is yet another instance where this video makes Ian look
   stereotypically awkward.* It needs to be clearer why Ian is waving—he is
   not just waving out of the blue at the camera. He is waving because he
   successfully joined a videoconference and is waving at fellow participants.
   It would help if you added visuals of a few people who have logged into the
   same meeting as Ian. These visuals could be recycled from the people you
   show at the end of each video during the "It's about people" tagline.

   *1:50: This awkward kitchen staging contributes to the overall
   awkwardness of the Ian video.* Can you cut this part where he
   inventories the cooking pan on the office desk and instead show more of him
   holding the tongs or the peppers or looking at the tablet? The less
   attention you draw to the awkward cooking-pan-on-office-desk staging, the

Sophie, basketball fan with Down syndrome


   *2:11: Please consider cutting the line “One day I’ll make it!,”* which
   seems very out of place here. It comes right after Sophie says it takes her
   a long time to look up words in the dictionary. This sentence in this
   location implies that she will eventually have a much larger
vocabulary. Simplest
   solution is to just to remove this line. But if you want to end her
   story on an upbeat, you could remove “One day I’ll make it!” and move to
   this spot the two lines that Sophie currently says at the beginning of this
   office scenario: “My dream is to become a senior assistant. I know I can do

Stefan, student with ADHD and dyslexia


   *0:44 Recommend cutting this sentence: "My dyslexia also causes uneven
   memory for me."* The wording is hard to follow and it may not be
   accurate to say that dyslexia "causes" memory problems.

Elias, retiree with low vision, hand tremor, and short-term memory loss


   *0:38: It’s confusing to see Elias look at the camera and talk, but his
   narration doesn’t match his mouth movements. *It takes a while to
   realize the video is showing him talking to his daughter. This would be
   easier to understand that we're seeing a conversation if you show the
   daughter as the bigger image and him as the inset or show them both the
   same size.


Julie Rawe

Special Projects Editor


Pronounced "raw" (like "uncooked")

She | her

Received on Friday, 2 December 2022 07:45:04 UTC