- From: Paul Grosso <pgrosso@arbortext.com>
- Date: Thu, 19 Apr 2001 08:51:10 -0500
- To: Susan Lesch <lesch@w3.org>, www-xml-fragment-comments@w3.org
Susan, Thank you for your comments which, as always, are quite helpful. I expect they will all be incorporated into the next draft. regards, paul At 18:15 2001 04 18 -0700, Susan Lesch wrote: >These are just a few comments on your XML Fragment Interchange >Candidate Recommendation [1]. It accomplishes so much in so little >space it is a pleasure to read. > >You might consider cutting the change notes when and if you go to >Recommendation, to simplify even more. > >The URIs for previous versions would be more readable if they were >newline-delimited rather than space-delimited. > >Globally, Docbook -> DocBook and aka -> a.k.a. > >ACME.COM is a registered domain. W3C recommends using IANA's >example.com, example.net, and example.org for examples. Please see RFC >2606 section 3 at http://www.ietf.org/rfc/rfc2606.txt. > >The beginnings of the Abstract and Overview seem to be copied from >OASIS TR 9601:1996 (http://www.oasis-open.org/html/tr9601.html). I >didn't look any farther. You might credit them, or reword any text that >wasn't W3C's originally. It may be that Paul Grosso has some copyright >in OASIS's TR; I don't know. > >In the Overview par. 3, the long section in parentheses about >send/receive could be cut, as these terms are defined in section 3 >using exactly the same words. > >Same with these two sentences that appear more or less identically in >both sections 1 and 2. I would cut one set. > The goal of this activity is to define a way to enable processing > of small parts of an XML document without having to process > everything up to the part in question. This can be done > regardless of whether the parts are entities or not, and the > parts can either be viewed immediately or accumulated for later > use, assembly, or other processing. > >The abbreviation fcs is defined in section 3 in lowercase. Twice in 5.1 >and sometimes in section 5.2 it is capitalized FCS. Could you choose >one or the other? (Lowercase with or without <code> markup is fine.) > >Below, a section and paragraph number is followed by a quote and then >a suggestion. > >1. par. 3 >is call the fragment entity >is called the fragment entity > >2. last par. is one really long sentence. Could break at the semicolon. > >3. par. 1 >for the purposed of >for the purposes of > >5.1 par. after second Note >comes from Fragment Interchange namespace >comes from the Fragment Interchange namespace > >5.1 last par. and 5.4 par. 2 >arabic numbers >Arabic numerals > >web server (twice) >Web server > >5.1 second example >arabic >Arabic > >5.2 first constraint >Fragment Interchange Namespace URI >Fragment Interchange namespace URI > >5.2 definition >fragment Interchange namespace >Fragment Interchange namespace > >5.4 par. 2 >web server >Web server > >5.4.1 last par. >for the purposes of completeness of this example >for the purpose of completeness in this example > >In A.2. MIME and RFC 2387, is there a reason for linking to imc.org >rather than to ietf.org or rfc-editor.org? > >C.2 external entity >Base 64 >base64 > >[1] http://www.w3.org/TR/2001/CR-xml-fragment-20010212 > >Best wishes for your project, > >-- >Susan Lesch - mailto:lesch@w3.org tel:+1.858.483.4819 >World Wide Web Consortium (W3C) - http://www.w3.org/
Received on Thursday, 19 April 2001 10:42:04 UTC