Re: new version of Passwords

/ Vincent Quint <Vincent.Quint@inrialpes.fr> was heard to say:
| Thanks to Ed, a new version of the draft TAG finding Passwords in the Clear
| is available for review at
|
|    http://www.w3.org/2001/tag/doc/passwordsInTheClear-52

Looks good, Ed. Only one substantive comment: didn't we agree to
replace the Yankee Group reference with something more generic?

The rest are editorial nits:

s/about the user of/about the use of/
s/and the needs to/and the need to/
s/display, temporary/display and temporary/
s/When passwords are/When a password is/
s/some external secure systems/some external security systems/
s/any organization who wishes/any organization that wishes/
s/customers data/customer's data/
s/secure transfers of/secure transfer of/
s/prevent the user of/prevent the use of/
s/developed by Netscape/developed by Netscape,/
s/Soap/SOAP/

I'm not sure how to parse "While SSL/TLS secures SOAP bases messages
point to point" perhaps s/bases //?

s/your using/you're using/
s/SOAP package/SOAP message/ (just for consistency)
s/WS_Security/WS Security/

Is "message level Security' capitalized correctly? And note the
missmatched quotes.

s/stop some from/stop someone from/

The cross references to references use superscripted numbers, but the
numbers don't actually appear in the references.

                                        Be seeing you,
                                          norm

-- 
Norman Walsh
XML Standards Architect
Sun Microsystems, Inc.

Received on Tuesday, 10 October 2006 16:45:14 UTC