Forwarded message 1
Here are minor editorial comments on the "Common Markup for
micropayment per-fee-links" last call Working Draft [1] "work in
progress." Please feel free to use (or not use them) however you see
fit.
Comments:
Could the names of the parameters baseurl and requesturl be baseuri
and requesturi? From what little I know, the term "URI" has been
preferred to "URL" since RFC 2396 in August, 1998.
I think the spec would be clearer if paragraphs were P-delimited
(rather than BR-delimited).
Perhaps this was by design, but there are lots of 's where no
non-breaking space seems to be needed. This can break browsers' Find
command. Could the 's be removed?
The specification uses foo.org, merchant.org, miamachina.org (open at
the time of this writing), and airline.com which are registered
domains. IANA registered example.com, example.net, and example.org
for exactly this kind of use. (See section 3 of RFC 2606 also known
as BCP 32 at http://www.ietf.org/rfc/rfc2606.txt.)
"HTML 4.0" appears a number of times and may need to be updated to
"HTML 4" or "HTML 4.01".
"JAVA" and "Javascript" also appear a number of times; to my eye,
"Java" (one capital letter) and "JavaScript" (compound word with
capital letters) would be correct. "per-fee-links," "customer,"
"merchant," and "browser" could all be lowercase throughout. Also,
you might consider the more general term "user agent" for each
instance of "browser"; a UA could be a browser or some new purchasing
agent, for example.
From here on, a section and paragraph or list item number is followed
by a quote and then a suggestion. Comments are in brackets [].
Title
Common Markup for micropayment per-fee-links
Common Markup for Micropayment Per-fee-links
[That's a guess at US English capitalization rules in a title.]
Abstract
a interoperable manner
an interoperable manner
Table of Contents
[Section 4 has this style rule: .level2 { list-style-type:
lower-roman } but in the running text, the list-style-type is
decimal. I would make them both decimal to match other W3C specs.]
1.1 par. 2
"...Most micropayment systems also try to provide a simple
user interface, especially making buying as easy as
possible."
[could read:]
Most micropayment systems also try to provide a simple
user interface, to make buying as easy as possible.
"...Namely, micropayment content shall be reached by clicking
on special, new sort of links, which we call
per-fee-links."
[four minor changes here:]
Micropayment content shall be reached by clicking
on a special, new sort of link, which we call a
per-fee-link.
1.1 par. 3
and in particular for encoding per-fee-links.
and in particular to encode per-fee-links.
2.1 par. 1
The basic architecture consist of:
The basic architecture consists of:
2.2
to the consumers browser
to the consumer's browser
3.2 list item 1
allowing "click and pay" interface,
allowing a "click and pay" interface,
4.1.1 par. 1
(if not already paid for)
(if the charge is not already paid)
followed by a currency unit
followed by a currency code
4.1.1 list item 1
(amount Customer will get)
(amount customer will receive)
4.1.1 list item 3
"...These currency codes are the three-letter ISO 4217 codes
or unregistered four to ten letters currency names.
(Refer to currencies naming in Appendix 7)"
[could read (I added a reference link here too):]
Currency codes are the three-letter ISO 4217 [ISO4217]
codes, or unregistered four to ten letter currency names.
(Refer to currency naming in Appendix 7.)
4.1.1 last par.
unless ExtData parameter
unless the ExtData parameter
4.1.3 par. 1
This requested url is
This requested URL is
specified. (allowing
specified (allowing
4.1.4 par. 1
specified. (allowing
specified (allowing
by requesturl parameter
by the requesturl parameter
set of requesturl's
set of requesturls
requesturl are identifiers
requesturls are identifiers
payments systems
payment systems
4.1.5 par. 2 list item 1
, xxx is
, and xxx is
4.1.5 par. 2 list item 2
Then the rest of parameters of system 1
The rest of the parameters of system 1
giving a location to learn & register for that payment system
giving a location where the customer can learn about and register for
that payment system
4.1.5 par. 3 Note
the same parameter name will be used e.g.
the same parameter name be used, e.g.
4.1.8 par. 1
to be replaced by the wallet by a proper payment system short code name
to be replaced by the wallet with a proper payment system short code name
(see Appendix 6).
(See Appendix 6.)
4.1.9
"...The merchantname parameter, which takes a character
string, allows giving a merchant name designation."
[could read:]
The merchantname parameter, which takes a character
string, allows for a merchant name designation.
4.1.12 last par.
same frame as current per-fee-link
same frame as the current per-fee-link
4.1.17 par. 2
"...such as currency conversion table, price-code table
(mapping from price code to price), general information
and policy of the seller, etc."
could read:
such as a currency conversion table, a price-code table
(mapping from price code to price), general information
about and policies of the seller, etc.
4.1.18
is optional, it MAY
is optional; it MAY
4.2 par. 2
probably done by browser.)
probably done by the browser).
4.2 par. 4 Note
allowing to construct
allowing construction of
4.2 table heading
(Client Requested url)
(Client Requested URL)
5. par. 1
a common Markup.
a common markup.
5. par. 5
Is the right Plugin installed in the browser ?
Is the right plug-in installed in the browser?
5. par. 6
link.Solutions
link. Solutions
A1.2 par. 3
list of URIs designated resources
list of URIs designating resources
A1.3 par. 1
use EMBED element.
use the EMBED element.
A1.3 par. 4
within EMBED element
within the EMBED element
A1.4 par. 1
Java Applet
Java applet
A2.1 Benefits with RDF encoding:
A2.1 Benefits of RDF encoding:
A2.2
"...Included in the content of a Web in the section of the
HTML document (inside the HEAD element)."
could read:
Inside the HEAD element of HTML documents
A2.4.1 Basic Serialization Syntax par. 1
see Section 2.2.3., Schemas and Namespaces.
see [RDF] Section 2.2.3., Schemas and Namespaces.
A3 par. 1
for information purpose only
for information purposes only
As today most browsers are non-aware RDF browsers
As today most user agents are non-RDF-aware browsers
A3.1 par. 2
dynamic (process on flight
dynamic (process on-the-fly
A3.2
"...This solution generation a final HTML page on the server
from an HTML source and RDF documents will:"
could read:
This solution -- generating a final HTML page on the
server from HTML source and RDF documents -- will:
A3.2 list item 4
without any changes on the HTML source
without any changes to the HTML source
A4.3
Opera Only
Opera only
A4.4 list item 2
.(a SCRIPT element for example)
(a SCRIPT element for example).
A4.4 list item 3
User agents ignores
User agents ignore
A5 par. 2
an other
another
A5.2 par. 2
Document Object Model
[Perhaps add a reference link there.]
Document Object Model [DOM]
with Internet Explorer browser.
with Internet Explorer browsers.
A6 par. 3
wich
which
allowing to prevent
to prevent
A7 par. 2
ISO 4217
[Perhaps add a reference link.]
ISO 4217 [ISO4217]
A7 list item 1
a four to ten letters currency name
a four to ten letter currency name
"...In addition, one can also mention a meta-escape sequence;
a new reserved prefix "z-" indicating any string
starting with "z-" has "z-" removed from it before use.
(e.g. z-x-u turns into x-u as a registered code, not
into an x- extension string)."
could read:
In addition, one can employ [assert?] a meta-escape sequence:
a new reserved prefix "z-" indicates that any string
starting with "z-" has "z-" removed from it before use.
(E.g., z-x-u turns into x-u as a registered code, not
into an x- extension string.)
A7 par. 3
Air lines miles
airline miles
References:
[I would add [ISO4217] to link to 4.1.1 list item 3 and to A7 par. 2.]
"Codes for the representation of currencies and funds", ISO
4217:1995. For more information, consult
http://www.iso.ch/cate/d23132.html.
[Maybe add [DOM] (Level 1 or 2?) to link to A5.2 par. 2.]
"Document Object Model (DOM) Level 1 Specification," Lauren Wood et
al. eds., 1 October, 1998. This W3C Recommendation is available at:
http://www.w3.org/TR/REC-DOM-Level-1
[for XHTML which is now a Recommendation:]
This W3C Recommendation is available at: http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1
[1] http://www.w3.org/TR/1999/WD-Micropayment-Markup-19990825
Best wishes and good luck for your project,
--
Susan Lesch
susan@textet.com