WCAG-EM copy/edit suggestions

Hi folks,

Many congratulations on a brilliant and useful body of work. 

I have a couple of accessibility related requests and a number of copy/edit
suggestions:

* Accessibility related requests:
1. Your heading structure is great with a few notable exceptions. Could
the following heading level changes be made please?
A)  (Under 2.b) - Examples of Website Functionality - currently H3, change
to H5;
B) (Under 2.c) - Examples of Web Page Types - currently H3, change to H5;
C) (Under 2.e) - Examples of Other Relevant Web Pages - currently H3, change
to H5;
D) Appendices A, B and C - currently H3, change to H2.
All of the above are just to provide an efficient and reliable hierarchy for
those who use headings for navigation. 

2. Two lists under Step 2 have leading ellipses that appear in the code as
three periods (.). Some screen readers announce these, outputting  "dot,
dot, dot, between the bullet and the start of the item content. 
This can be cured by using the character entity reference …" to
replace the periods.

* Copy-edit and word-smith suggestions
All of the following should be treated as mild priority items, at editor's
discretion.

location: Introduction, first paragraph, second sentence:
current wording: "... how much knowledge the evaluators have of how the
website was or is being developed;"
suggested revision: "... how much knowledge the evaluators have of how the
website was, or is, being developed;"
rationale: Adding the comma separation when alternative verbs are used makes
the sentence clearer. 

location: Purposes for this Methodology (heading 
current wording: "Purposes for this Methodology "
suggested revision: "Purposes of this Methodology "
rationale: I think "for" is the wrong preposition for "Purposes".

location: Purposes for this methodology, fifth bullet point
current wording: ". who want to ensure that they met quality and policy
requirements."
suggested revision: ". who want to ensure that they have met quality and
policy requirements."
rationale:  "met" alone is past tense, "have met" makes it present and past
(continuous).

location: Terms and Definitions definition of Essential functionality, first
sentence
current wording: ". if removed, fundamentally changes the use or purpose of
the website for users." 
suggested revision: ". if removed, fundamentally degrades the use or purpose
of the website for users." 
rationale: As "changes" could mean improvements, it might be clearer if the
word "degrades" is used instead. 

location: Terms and Definitions definition of "Essential functionality",
first Note
current wording:  "completing and submitting the form provided on the
website" 
suggested revision: "completing and submitting the contact or registration
form provided on the website"
rationale:  "the form" alone sounds as though there is likely to be just
one. Alternative suggestion "an important form". 

location: Scope of Applicability, first sentence 
current wording: ". it is unambiguous whether it is part the website or
not."
suggested revision: ". it is unambiguous whether it is part of the website
or not."
rationale: Missing "of" in "part of the website". 

location: Example of Website Enclosure, second paragraph, third sentence 
current wording: ". defined as the target for evaluation then all the parts
of this area ." 
suggested revision: ". defined as the target for evaluation, then all the
parts of this area ."
rationale:  Missing comma after "evaluation". 

location: Particular Types of Websites, Note following the definition of
Website Using Responsive Design
current wording: "Considerations for mobile devices, operating systems, and
assistive technologies needs to be taken for websites using responsive
design techniques . 
suggested revision:  "Considerations for mobile devices, operating systems,
and assistive technologies need to be taken into account for websites using
responsive design techniques . 
rationale 1:  "Considerations ... need" or "Consideration ... Needs"
(subject-verb agreement).
rationale 2:  Considerations are made not taken, unless they are taken into
account. 

location:  Particular Evaluation Contexts, definition of Evaluating Third
Party Content, third sentence
current wording: "Thus in such cases evaluators will need to determining
whether such content is regularly monitored ." 
suggested revision: "In such cases evaluators will need to determine whether
such content is regularly monitored ."
rationale: "Thus" isn't needed and "determining" should be "determine". 

location: Step 1.c: Define an Accessibility Support Baseline, first Note,
last sentence 
current wording: "In this case the baseline is extended with the tools that
were used in addition."
suggested revision:  "In this case the baseline is extended by listing the
additional tools used."
rationale:  "in addition" is badly positioned at the end of the sentence,
suggested wording is simpler. 

location: Step 4.a: Check All Initial Web Pages, Note, first sentence
current wording: "and others that are occur repeatedly" 
suggested revision: "and others that occur repeatedly"
rationale: "are" needs to be removed. 

location: Step 4.a: Sub-heading Conforming Alternate Versions, second
sentence
current wording: "For example, and video content may ... "
suggested revision: "For example, video content may ... "
rationale: "and" is not needed here.

location:  Step 4.a: Sub-heading Accessibility Support, second sentence
current wording: "For example, the captions for a video need to be provided
in a way so that they can be displayed to users."
suggested revision: "For example, the captions for a video need to be
provided in a way that they can be displayed to users."
rationale: "so" isn't needed. 

location: Step 4.a: Sub-heading Non-Interference, first sentence
current wording:  "Content on a web page or web page state may not conform
with WCAG 2.0, even though the web page or web page state as a whole might
still conform to WCAG 2.0."
suggested revision: "Content on a web page or web page state may not conform
to WCAG 2.0, even though the web page or web page state as a whole might
still conform to WCAG 2.0."
rationale:  Change "conform with" to "conform to", For correctness and
consistency 

location:  Step 5.A: Document the Outcomes of Each Step, first paragraph,
second sentence
current wording: "This documentation does not need to be public (the level
of ...)."
suggested revision: "This documentation does not need to be public, (the
level of ...)."
rationale: Needs a comma before the opening parenthesis. 

location:  Methodology Requirement 5.c: (summary) -
current wording: "Provide an statement describing the outcomes  ..." 
suggested revision: "Provide a statement describing the outcomes  ..." 
rationale:  Incorrect use of "an" .


Sorry if I'm being too picky. 

Again, well done all. 

Bim

Received on Friday, 27 June 2014 15:11:41 UTC