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Content Usable Edits - Request for Approval

From: Rachael Bradley Montgomery <rachael@accessiblecommunity.org>
Date: Mon, 23 Nov 2020 14:55:23 -0500
Message-ID: <CAL+jyYJ65fHWqZMsLRipT-NEjVtQxwAf7-46i1UtJJJVQ43mQw@mail.gmail.com>
To: public-cognitive-a11y-tf <public-cognitive-a11y-tf@w3.org>
Hello,

Please read and respond.

I have made changes to Content Usable based on the issues listed below and
well as editorial corrections from Abi, EA and Lisa.

   - The github list of changes is at
   https://github.com/w3c/coga/pull/226/files (the index.html and
   design.html files only)
   - The current version with these changes is at
   https://raw.githack.com/w3c/coga/Editoral-Review-Issues-Fix/content-usable/index.html

A brief summary of the editorial fixes are below along with a proposed
response for each issue. Please read through these changes and related
responses and write back and approve these changes or write back with what
needs to be fixed in order for approval

Thank you,

Rachael

*Editorial Changes*

   - Tense, subject/verb agreement corrections, and removal of duplicate
   words
   - Additional commas
   - Change and/or to or
   - Some sentence and word choice simplification
   - Word correction
   - Change:  *A page heading reads "Service not available." *to  *A page
   heading that does not say where you are. For example a page heading that
   reads "Service not available."*
   - Adding "This includes" to some patterns
   - Replacing learning disabilities with more specific types such as
   dyslexia (per Abi's review)


*Issue 189:* Request to change the sentence in 4.4.9.3 How it Helps "If
they need to remember what they are doing, divide the steps and track what
they have done they are much more likely to make mistakes."   (Link to
Github Issue 189 <https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/189>)

*Draft Response*: Thank you for bringing our attention to this mistake. We
have changed the sentence to: They are more likely to make mistakes if they
need to remember what they are doing, divide the steps, and track what they
have done.

*Issue 188:* Request to change ADD in 4.4.5.3 to ADHD (Link to Github Issue
188 <https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/188>)

*Draft Response*:   Thank you for pointing out this error. During the
glossary process we decided to reference this as Attention Deficit
(hyperactivity) disorder, AD(H)D. We have updated this example and any of
ADHD to AD(H)D.

*Issue 187:* Request to change "in order to" to simpler "to"  (Link to
Github Issue 187 <https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/187>)

*Draft Response: *Thank you for writing with these suggestions. We have
made these changes.

*Issue 185: * Request to fix sentence "Clear layout helps people with
cognitive and learning disabilities that impact problem solving skills, get
overwhelmed when presented with a lot of text, impact problem solving
skills, those that and those with difficulties with more complicated
tasks". (Link to Github Issue 185 <https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/185>)

*Changed text to:*
Clear layout helps people who have cognitive and learning  disabilities
that impact problem solving skills, who get overwhelmed when presented with
a lot of text, and who have difficulties with more complicated tasks.

*Draft Response:* Thank you for taking the time to point this out. We have
made this correction.

*Issue 184:* The second bullet under the 4.2.2.4, the --- such as ----
should be removed. "Uses common design patterns, such as are documented in
the ARIA authoring best practices or are used in the most popular sites:"
 (Link to Github Issue 184 <https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/184>)

*Draft Response:*  Thank you for taking the time to poin this out. This
sentence needed reworking. After review, we changed this to "Common design
patterns, such as those documented in the ARIA authoring best practices or
used in the most popular sites:"

*Issue 166: *Section 6 "Use Cases / Persona" says "nine personas have been
created", but there are ten of them. (Link to Github Issue 166
<https://github.com/w3c/coga/issues/166>)

*Draft Response:*    Thank you for pointing this out. We have corrected it.

Rachael Montgomery, PhD
Director, Accessible Community
rachael@accessiblecommunity.org

"I will paint this day with laughter;
I will frame this night in song."
 - Og Mandino
Received on Monday, 23 November 2020 19:56:18 UTC

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