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Re: Editorial comments for BAD

From: Cliff Tyllick <Cliff.Tyllick@tceq.texas.gov>
Date: Fri, 07 Oct 2011 13:01:49 -0500
Message-Id: <4E8EF83C.41EE.0066.0@tceq.texas.gov>
To: "Shadi Abou-Zahra" <shadi@w3.org>
Cc: <wai-eo-editors@w3.org>
You're welcome, Shadi!
I just realized I hit "Send" before I gave examples of first words that need to be capped in sentences that follow a run-in heading. Every one of those is in the Overview.
Near the top of the page, "Note: This Demo..." instead of "Note: this Demo..."
Near the bottom of the page, the first roman letter following each bolded head in the bulleted list under "Using the Demo." Come to think of it, "Using This Demo" would be a stronger heading there.
That's it for those errors in the main content. Others:
On the Survey:
Under "Favorite Park," it should be "Jurassic," not "Jurrasic"
"Favorite" seems to be American at the top of the page (Favorite Park) and British at the bottom ("favourite and least favourite organ"). Shouldn't we be consistent? Our subject-verb agreement follows the British convention, so our favourite should, too.
On Tickets, do we mean to be misspelling Thelonious Monk's last name?
Finally for now, on the News page, Accessible version, explanatory notes:
Note 03, "Times New Roman," not "Times new Roman"
Notes 05 and 10: Capitalize "the" after "Note:"
Once again, tiny stuff. Great work!
>>> On 10/7/2011 at 11:59 AM, in message <4E8F2FD8.2090807@w3.org>, Shadi Abou-Zahra <shadi@w3.org> wrote:
Thank you Cliff, all fixed.


On 7.10.2011 17:55, Cliff Tyllick wrote:
> On the Survey page, it should be "This Week's" instead of "This Weeks's" in both headings.
> On the home page, we need to remove the word "down" from the blurb under "Lack of brains hinders research." In other words, it should read:
> Brain donations: huge drop off in brain donations due to the 'success' of 'Slow Traffic, Safe Streets' policy
> not:
> Brain donations: huge drop off in brain donations down due to the 'success' of 'Slow Traffic, Safe Streets' policy
> Throughout the document, the first word in each sentence that follows a run-in headings should be capped. For example,
> On the "News" page, in the last sentence under the heading "Tough Wahoonie," the word "Ordnance" should be "ordinance." ("Ordnance" is explosives; "ordinance" is a type of law.)
> In the same sentence, "City" and "Winter" should be lower case; they are not proper nouns.
> Similarly, in the second column, these words are not proper nouns and should be lower case:
> in all stories, Mayor (except where the mayor's name immediately follows it)
> in the first story:
> Judge
> Judges
> Trombone Forgery
> On the same page, there is an extra period at the end of "Your Shout."
> On the same page, the last word should be "off," not "in."
> If I have time to view the other pages, I will send edits for them, too.
> Thanks!
> Cliff
> Cliff Tyllick
> Usability assessment coordinator
> Agency Communications Division
> Texas Commission on Environmental Quality
> 512-239-4516
> Cliff.Tyllick@tceq.texas.gov 
> How is our customer service ( http://www.tceq.texas.gov/goto/customersurvey )?

Shadi Abou-Zahra - http://www.w3.org/People/shadi/ 
Activity Lead, W3C/WAI International Program Office
Evaluation and Repair Tools Working Group (ERT WG)
Research and Development Working Group (RDWG)
Received on Friday, 7 October 2011 18:02:28 UTC

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