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HowPeopleUseWeb - Stories issues

From: Shawn Henry <shawn@w3.org>
Date: Thu, 07 Apr 2011 17:41:02 -0500
Message-ID: <4D9E3D7E.5000105@w3.org>
To: Shadi Abou-Zahra <shadi@w3.org>
CC: wai-eo-editors <wai-eo-editors@w3.org>
  Hi Shadi,

Stories page is really good! Below are some content (as opposed to copyedit) points. Feel free to send any of it to the EOWG mailing list for discussion.


1. Mr. Lee

"Mr. Lee bookmarked a series of online shopping sites where he could get reliable information on product colors or where he could override the colors, and not have to guess at which items were discounted."
I don't understanding how overriding the colours would make him not have to guess what items are discounted. Are you suggesting that he changes the colours of the styles that indicate discounted for all the websites he uses? That doesn't seem reasonable.
Maybe it's just a grammar thing. Does this work for what you want to say?: [[Mr. Lee bookmarks the online shopping sites that list the product colors, that let him override text and background colors so he can make the pages easier to read, and that clearly indicate things like discounted items.]]

2. Mr Jones

2.1. "some websites have forms and controls that do not have keyboard equivalents."
I'm afraid that people might read this and think that every form field and control should have an access key. Also, "keyboard equivalents" is not explained here or on the other pages.

2.2. "In order for Mr. Jones to continue working with the publisher, web developers built customized work-arounds into the CMS to add some of the keyboard support that was initially missing. It is not an optimal solution and only works for some of the functions, but the publisher intends to upgrade the CMS to one with full keyboard support, especially since other employees found that keyboard support was easier on their hands."
When I read the first sentence, I was concerned that this recommended doing work-arounds instead of fixing the CMS, and made it sound like there was a lot of accommodation required by the organization's web developers. Later in the paragraph I see that you've said the CMS should have done it. But I think the ideas are too separated for some readers to catch. I think that needs to be made more clear; that is, that the extra work was required because the CMS was bad, and a good CMS would not have the problem.

3. Ms. Martinez

"They also found they can provide captions in other languages to support international students, students who could not download or play the audio, and many more."
The "many more" tripped me up. Sentence needs editing to clarify... and reconsider if it really did help many more.

4. Ms. Laitinen

4.1. "To use her computer and the Web, Ms. Laitinen uses:
* Screen reader software that interprets what is displayed on the screen and generates speech output
* Web browser with keyboard support to help use websites without a mouse"
Does she use keyboard support other than that provided by screen reader? Do some (common) browsers not provide the keyboard support that she uses?

4.1. "It was a challenge to find a solution that was accessible to her and to other employees with disabilities, but it proved to be beneficial for many of the staff."
Do we need to say why it benefited other staff?

5. Ms. Olsen

"She set her web browser to freeze or hide animated graphics so that she can focus on the relevant information but that does not always work on every website."
Do common browsers have such settings? Do we want to say why it works on some websites and not others, or is that on another page?

6. Mr. Yunus

"Another barrier that he encounters is CAPTCHA images that he finds on several social networking websites. These distorted images of text are intended to tell computers and humans apart, but Mr. Yunus cannot read the small and distorted text, even if he enlarges the image."
Does "These distorted images of text are intended to tell computers and humans apart," add unnecessary complexity? Or does the explanation help here?

7. Mr. Sands

7.1 "Mr. Sands has put groceries in bags for customers for the past year at a supermarket."
This sentence is quite awkward. I would say "Mr. Sand bags groceries..." or "Mr. Sands works as a grocery bagger..." or "Mr. Sands has a job bagging groceries..." Are any of these understandable to people in different countries and non-native speakers?
Maybe: [[Mr. Sands has a job bagging groceries for customers at a supermarket near his house.]] I'm not sure if the "for the past year" is important. "near his house" is good because then he doesn't have to use transportation and can carry groceries home easily.

7.2. "He found that he could use the website without much difficulty because the items were clearly indicated, the information and instructions were formulated in simple language that is easy to understand, and the navigation was consistent and easy to use."
I can't think what you mean by "the items were clearly indicated"?

8. Ms. Kaseem

8.1 "She is deaf and recently became legally blind too... ...braille device"
It seems this would be stronger if she was born with visually disability (maybe progressive) and later becomes deaf. If she *recently* became blind, she wouldn't know braille yet.

"She is deaf and recently became legally blind too, but she can see small portions of a screen."
This needs more explanation. Maybe should be both more broad about her condition and more detailed about how it impacts web use.

Received on Thursday, 7 April 2011 22:41:08 UTC

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