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Re: Call for Review: [Responding/Reporting doc] Approaching Organizations with Inaccessible Websites to Encourage Accessibility

From: Jennifer Sutton <jsuttondc@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, 04 Dec 2009 01:29:28 -0800
Message-Id: <7.0.1.0.2.20091204005823.01260fb0@gmail.com>
To: "EOWG (E-mail)" <w3c-wai-eo@w3.org>
Eowg:

These comments will focus on edits that I do think need to be made 
before publication. They probably don't need discussion on the 
telecon. in just a few hours.

I am looking at:
http://www.w3.org/WAI/EO/Drafts/responding/
I don't se a specific date, but I do see "December" in the "Document 
Info" section, so I believe I've got the right version.

I see some great additions and clarifications.  Kudos to all.

Is everyone else as ready and eager to promote this as I am?  I have 
a list of ideas, but I'm not sure how EOWG coordinates these document 
roll-outs, so I'll skip that for now.


1.  Does the page title and "h1" need to be changed to reflect the 
new title, as in the message below?

2.  "The
Accessible Web Browsing [draft]
  resource provides guidance on configuring your computer system and 
resolve some
barriers."

Maybe "and describes how to resolve . . ."

3.  "However, in many cases[add comma] your

4. "If you can not find"

Should it be "cannot," or is this an Americanism on my part?

5. "they may be interesting in contacting the organization."

Should be interested.

6.  "and the impact on your use of their website."

Change "their" to "the."

Sometimes, the subject seems to be an organization, but then, there 
are references to "they" and "their."

7.  Getting a Response
Different organizations have different cultures and different systems 
for managing
correspondence and handling feedback and complaints.

I wonder if maybe one of the "different"s could be eliminated, like this:


"Different organizations have different cultures and systems for managing
correspondence and handling feedback and complaints.

8. "If you are not receiving satisfactory
responses within a reasonable timeframe[add comma] consider"

Editor's discretion:
9. "Unfortunately[add comma] many organizations will not notify you 
of this, especially if they

9.1.  Also, there's a sentence that startts with "Ideally" earlier in 
the document.

Maybe I am an old school comma freak, and they're not needed any more 
after an introductory adverb.

10.  In this section (and in any other places I may not have 
noticed), I think the title needs to be changed, doesn't it?

Using this Document

11.  I don't know about the ramifications for this, in terms of how 
the Web site works, but should the link still have "Responding" in 
its URI, or should it be changed to "approaching," or something else 
that makes sense?

Talk to you all in a few hours.

Jennifer


At 09:50 AM 12/2/2009, Shawn Henry wrote:
>Dear EOWG and WAI-AGE Task Force participants,
>
>The document "Approaching Organizations with Inaccessible Websites 
>to Encourage Accessibility" (formerly called 'How to Report an 
>Inaccessible Website' and 'Responding to Inaccessible Websites') is 
>now available for review at:
>   http://www.w3.org/WAI/EO/Drafts/responding/
>
>Please *send any issues to the EOWG mailing list*, and we will 
>discuss them at the EOWG teleconference on 4 December.
>
>Please *indicate if your comments are either*:
>1. important to be addressed before this version is published, or
>2. up to editor's discretion &/or can be addressed in a future version
>
>Thanks!
>~Shawn
>
>
>-----
>Shawn Lawton Henry
>W3C Web Accessibility Initiative (WAI)
>e-mail: shawn@w3.org
>phone: +1.617.395.7664
>about: http://www.w3.org/People/Shawn/
>
>
Received on Friday, 4 December 2009 09:31:14 GMT

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