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Re: new mock-up uploaded

From: Danny Ayers <danny.ayers@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, 13 Jul 2007 09:54:46 +0100
Message-ID: <1f2ed5cd0707130154v6f7a6e27k9b5b7bf7af322b45@mail.gmail.com>
To: "Dunja Ewinger" <de@webxcerpt.com>
Cc: "W3C SWEO IG" <public-sweo-ig@w3.org>
On 12/07/07, Dunja Ewinger <de@webxcerpt.com> wrote:
> Dear SWEOs,
>
> I have put together a new mock-up based on the results of the survey.

Looking really good, I reckon the overall style works well.

> I decided to work with a different use case which I found in a very
> early article about the Semantic Web in the Technology Review:
> http://www.technologyreview.com/printer_friendly_article.aspx?id=12640
>
> I thought online registration for an event concerns everyone, since the
> flyer will be disseminated on events where usually registered people are
> around... :-)

Right! I think this use case is a good choice.

Also of note - although I'm not sure if the specific testimonials are
the most suitable, including some comes across really powerfully, like
- "hey, this stuff works!"

Couple of places that may benefit from rewording (sorry, bit tight for
time, haven't got any alternate text):

"But on the Semantic Web those bits will be labeled..." - I don't
know, to me this has the feel of 'the Semantic Web is all about
metadata', rather than data in general.

"Contextualize the use of data by using ontologies." - depends on the
target audience (has that been decided - afraid I've not been
following discussion too closely?), but this will probably be either
preaching to the converted (for a miniscule minority) or mumbo jumbo
(to the vast majority). I'd be tempted to avoid the 'O' word
altogether.

I'm not entirely sure of the layer cake (more discussions I've not
been following...) - this version with UI and apps is one of the best,
but does it really convey what we want to convey? Dunno. A tweak I'd
suggest if it stays in is to make sure all the acronyms are expanded
nearby.

the last paragraph seems a bit clunky:
[[
Semantic Web applications are not require to use technologies from all
the presented layers. Since Semantic Web issues are investigated at
moment, the presented palette of Semantic Web technologies will be
extended in the future.
]]
I'd be tempted to drop that for something short & snappy (???).

"like the RSS success story has already shown" - hmm, I'm not entirely
comfortable with that, but can't put my finger on why...

ok, one concrete suggestion:

"Semantic Web – is an extension of the current web."
=>
"Semantic Web – is an evolving extension of the current web."
[that word courtesy of the Wikipedia entry]

Cheers,
Danny.








-- 

http://dannyayers.com
Received on Friday, 13 July 2007 14:07:17 GMT

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