editing suggs for Social Biz Workshop pages

HOME PAGE:  http://www.w3.org/2013/socialweb/Overview.html

A) First bullet of 2nd para, **are** should be deleted:
What are the use-cases and requirements **are** driving social business and what is its overall architecture?

B) 3rd bullet of 2nd para, **what** could be deleted, OR the sentence re-written per the second example, below:
Current:  Are there the current problems facing social business and **what** technologies that could and should be standardized?

Proposed:  What are the current problems facing social business and which technologies could and should be standardized?

C) Last bullet, should "Pubsubhubbub" be capitalized, as "PubSubHubbub"?

D) In the list of the Program Committee:
-- Amit Goel, University of Central Floria<http://www.ucf.edu/> .. .Florida is misspelled
-- Ashok's last name is misspelled...  should be "Malhotra" (from Oracle)


GOALS AND SCOPE:  http://www.w3.org/2013/socialweb/topics.html

A) Last sentence, 3rd paragraph, missing something in last sentence:
This will take the place of a final report for the workshop and a possible draft Working Group charter(s). produce a roadmap with a possible draft Working Group charter(s) towards.

B) 1st sentence, 4th para, is awkward ... too long; runs on:
The scope will be open, but with a focus on social business; as one area where these technologies are already used with great effect is the emerging field of social business, as championed by the W3C by the W3C Social Business Community Group<http://www.w3.org/community/socbizcg/>.

C) Last para, 2nd to last sentence, 2 points:
Based on the findings of a W3C Social Business Jam<http://www.w3.org/2011/socialbusiness-jam/report>, a a task force and the W3C Social Business Group<http://www.w3.org/community/socbizcg/> created a draft map<http://www.w3.org/community/socbizcg/wiki/File:Social_ppt-JeffJ_intro_for_AC_v3-1.pptx> of the landscape.

a) "a a task force"

b) The link to the "map" of the landscape currently goes to Jeff's PPT presentation from AC meeting last year, within in which is embedded the diagram.  I suggest pulling those pages out, posting them separately somewhere, so there can be a direct link to the diagram(s).

PARTICIPATION: http://www.w3.org/2013/socialweb/participate.html

A) You probably know that "@@wiki" is awaiting a link, under "Experessions of Interest"

B) In the 2nd bullet list, 2nd bullet:
Overasll social Business architecture

a) "Overall" is misspelled

b) Seems like "social Business" should either both be capitalized, or neither

WHO SHOULD ATTEND? http://www.w3.org/2013/socialweb/attend.html

A) 2nd bullet .. "business" is misspelled:
Companies interested in or already using social busiess models.

B) 5th bullet ... missing closing paragraph mark:
Developers and software companies with experience of success in defining and implementing social web architecture components and solutions (including both experiences of success and failure in order to determine what went wrong, what needs to change

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Hope this is helpful - Ann


Ann Bassetti
Associate Technical Fellow
Boeing Information Technology
Global Collaboration Technologies
mobile:  +1.206.218.8039
email:  ann.bassetti@boeing.com

Received on Wednesday, 15 May 2013 18:18:13 UTC