minor comments for WD-MathML2-20000328

Here are minor editorial comments on your MathML Last Call Working 
Draft [1] "work in progress," based on one reading. They may or may 
not be useful at this stage, so please feel free to use or ignore 
them, however you see fit.

Comments
--------

Some images have transparent backgrounds like f3012.gif. Could they 
have opaque white backgrounds (except the first, f1001.gif in chapter 
1, which illustrates the problem)?

In chapter 4, it looks like a script or stylesheet error caused this: 
There are dozens of missing spaces between marked up attribute and 
element names and the following non-marked up identifiers. To pick 
the most obvious example, a search for "encoding</code>attributes" 
gets 59 hits in the source. The others are listed below as typos.

Also in chapter 4, there are many occurrences of "takes the 
attributes definitionURL, encoding". The word "and" might be clearer 
than the comma; so maybe say, "takes the definitionURL and encoding 
attributes" like the others.

In 4.4.9, 4.4.10.1, 4.4.10.2 and 4.4.10.3, under Example, the type of 
operator (e.g. n-ary) is sometimes plain. It could always be marked 
up <i>italic</i> to match the rest.

In chapter 7, the links to the test suite were "not found." When you 
get them connected, you may wish to keep this advice in mind: 
http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/www-html-editor/2000JanMar/0103.ht 
ml. It says use descriptive text for the link, and keep the text of 
the URI in the source.

"lower case" and "upper case" could read "lowercase" and "uppercase" 
(no spaces). They are dictionary words in English; Unicode 3.0 seems 
to agree at http://www.unicode.org/glossary/. They appear in the 
Description column of three Characters and Glyphs charts (files 
isomfrk.html, bycodes.html, and byalpha.html), and in the DTD package 
(files xhtml-math11.dtd a.k.a. xhtml-math11-f.dtd, and isomfrk.ent).

Apparently the use of "we" is frowned on in specifications. This 
report offers ways to avoid it. I couldn't find a proper reference 
for you, but one reason is offered in the final paragraph of 
http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/www-xml-linking-comments/2000JanMa 
r/0079.html which explains that first person English is difficult to 
translate.

Suggestions
-----------

You might want to add a numbered section to chapter 6 for "Fonts," 
and move the last paragraph of 6.1.2 STIX there.

In chapter 7, you could consider making the test suite a numbered 
section (for example, maybe 7.2.1.1 and move Deprecated to 7.2.1.2).

In chapter 4, vnbooks.com is a registered domain (as are openmath.org 
and uni.edu). mathslib.com, defs.org, and myrenderer.com were not 
registered at the time of this writing, but could be in the future. 
You might consider using example.com, example.org, or example.net 
which IANA registered for examples. See RFC 2606 section 3 at 
http://www.ietf.org/rfc/rfc2606.txt. Not sure what was meant by 
www.naturalnums.htm and www.primes.htm.

Minor typos
-----------

 From here on, a section number is followed by a quote, and then an 
idea for an improvement. Comments are in brackets [].

Status of this document - par. 7
eveolving
evolving

1.2.5 last line
over the situation that obtained
over the situation obtained

1.3.1 par. 1
well will
will

1.3.2.2 par. 1
"...But for a good number of reasons, once we got into the
     details this proved to be not so good an idea."
[To remove the "we," could be:]
     But for a good number of reasons, this proved to be not
     so good an idea.

2.1 par. 1
Specification
specification

2.1.1 par. 9
can can
can

2.1.4 par. 1
world-wide web
World Wide Web

2.2.1 - par. after 1st example
"...The mfrac and msqrt elements are used for generating
     fractions and square roots, respectively."
[Sentence seems to apply to the 2d (not 1st) example. Could this par. 
be moved down one?]

2.3.1 par. 1 needs an ending period.

2.3.1 par. 2
MathML Home Page ().
[I imagine this should link to http://www.w3.org/Math/]

2.3.4.1 par. 7 needs an ending period.

2.3.4.3 Order of processing attributes versus style sheets - par. 1
ways).
ways.

[Also, section 2.3.4.3 is CSS1 based. As you may know, the cascade 
order changed in CSS2 so that reader !important rules win.]

2.3.4.5 par. 2
attributqes
attributes

2.3.4.5 last par.
Schema
schema

3.1.2.1 par. 1 and 2
etcetera
et cetera [or etc.]

2.0 .)
2.0.)

3.2 par. 2
set of MathML characters described
set of MathML characters is described

3.2.1 - 2d to last par. needs an ending parenthesis.

3.2.4.8 Vertical Stretching Rules and Horizontal Stretching Rules - 
2d par. after list
the the
the

3.2.9.1 par. 1
In the mean time
In the meantime

3.3.1.2 mrow of one argument - par. 1
see sections Section 3.2.4... and Section...
see Section 3.2.4... and Section...

3.3.4.2 CSS compatibility of color attributes - last par.
[HTML4.0]
[HTML4] [or 4.01]

3.3.4.2 - 2d to last par.
allowed Section 2.3.4.2 [
allowed. See Section 2.3.4.2 [

3.3.6.2 - 2d par. after table
units Section 2.3.4.2 [
units. See Section 2.3.4.2 [

3.3.6.2 - 4th par. after table
"...the length value specified is the product of the
     specified number the length represented by the unit or
     pseudo-unit, and multiplied..."
[Sorry, I didn't understand this phrase. What are the two operands?]

3.3.8.2 par. 7
etcetera
et cetera [or etc.]

3.5.3.1 par. 4
have be
have been

3.5.3.3 par. 1
of of
of

3.5.4.2 par. after table
HTML 4.0 tables
HTML 4 tables [or HTML 4.01 tables]

3.6.1 par. 1
a MathML sub-expressions
a MathML sub-expression

interactivity Section 7.1.4 [
interactivity. See Section 7.1.4 [

3.6.1 - 2d to last example
"...<maction actiontype="highlight" my:color="#ff0000">
     expression </maction> <maction actiontype="highlight"
     my:background="#ff0000"> expression </maction>"
[Just a comment that conventional markup wisdom usually says if you 
set one color, you need to set them all. So for the purpose of giving 
a good example, maybe both color and background could be set at once:]
     <maction actiontype="highlight"
       my:color="#ff0000" my:background="#ff0000">
       expression </maction>

4.1.1 par. 1
recommendation
Recommendation

4.2.1.1 - 3d to last par.
csymbolelement
csymbol element

4.2.1.1 last par.
mntags
mn tags

4.2.1.3 - 3d to last par.
relnelement
reln element

4.2.1.4 pars. 1 and 3
definitionURLattributes
definitionURL attributes

4.2.1.4 par. 3 needs an ending period.

4.2.1.5 par. 2
it implicitly involves
they implicitly involve

4.2.1.6 par. 4
scopeattribute
scope attribute

4.2.2.1 - csymbol
PCDATAor
PCDATA or

4.2.2.2 par. 1
things like lists, sets.
things like lists and sets.

4.2.2.2 - apply
purpose is apply
purpose is to apply

an an
an

4.2.3.1 - 2d to last par.
applycontaining
apply containing

4.2.3.2 - partialdiff
bvarschema
bvar schema

4.2.3.2 - sum, product
productfunctions
product functions

conditionschemata
condition schemata

conditionschema
condition schema

4.2.3.2 - limit
lowlimitschemata
lowlimit schemata

4.2.3.2 - min, max
maximised
maximized

4.2.5 par. 1
and int element
an int element

4.2.6 par. 4
The semantics tags
The semantics tag

definitionURLattribute
definitionURL attribute

4.2.8 par. 1
provdies
provides

integers integers
integers

4.3.2.3 - last sentence
definitionURLattribute
definitionURL attribute

4.3.2.9 cn
formating
formatting

4.3.2.9 cn - real
`+'or `-'
`+' or `-'

4.3.2.9 cn - integer
base ten
base 10 [to match the other mentions of it]

4.4 list item 2
expressions sin(x) and may even regard it as a data entry error
expressions like sin(x) and may even regard them as data entry errors

4.4.1.1 - Default Rendering par. 1
contained wrapped
[one or the other]

PCDATAwrapped
PCDATA wrapped

4.4.1.1 - Default Rendering par. 2
it normally handles
they normally handle

4.4.1.3 par. 2 needs an ending period.

4.4.1.3 - Default Rendering
mrowelement
mrow element

4.4.2.1 - Discussion par. 3
arguments. while
arguments, while

4.4.2.1 - Discussion last par.
`parameters'such
`parameters' such

4.4.2.1 - Default Rendering par. 2
sinwould
sin would

4.4.2.5 - Discussion par. 2
encodingattributes
encoding attributes

4.4.2.7 - Discussion par. 2
relnelement
reln element

4.4.2.8 - Discussion par. 3
mathelement
math element

4.4.2.8 - Discussion par. 4
initialising
initializing

4.4.2.8 - Discussion last par.
to an fn element (This
to an fn element. (This

4.4.2.8 - Attributes - occurrence
function-modelindications
function-model indications

4.4.2.8 - Examples par. 2
lambdaconstruct
lambda construct

4.4.2.10 - Discussion par. 2
encodingattributes
encoding attributes

4.4.2.11 - Discussion par. 2
identelement
ident element

encodingattributes
encoding attributes

4.4.3.1 - Discussion par. 1
quotientreturns
quotient returns

4.4.3.1 through 4.4.3.17 (except 4.4.3.4) - Discussion par. 2
encodingattributes
encoding attributes

4.4.3.4 - Discussion par. 1
minare
min are

4.4.3.7 - Discussion par. 1
the value the ` a to the power of b'.
the value of `a to the power of b'. [?]

4.4.3.10 - Discussion par. 1
degreeelement
degree element

4.4.3.14 - Discussion par. 1
`exclusive or'operator
`exclusive or' operator

4.4.3.17 - Discussion par. 1
It must used
It must be used

4.4.3.17 - Discussion par. 1, and 4.4.3.18 par. 1
may either take the form of an apply or reln element
takes the form of an apply element [reln is deprecated.]

4.4.3.17 - Discussion par. 3
an quantifier
a quantifier

4.4.3.21 par. 1
MathML 2.0))
MathML 2.0)

4.4.5.3 and 4.4.5.6 - Discussion par. 1
bvarelements
bvar elements

4.4.7.1 and 4.4.7.2 - Discussion par. 1
a domains
domains [or a domain]

4.4.10.6 - Discussion par. 2
etcetera
et cetera [or etc.]

4.4.12.5 twice, and 4.4.12.6
ie.
i.e.

4.4.12.7
<i>e</i> <i>. It is approximately 2.718281828..</i>
<i>e</i>. It is approximately 2.718281828.

5.2.1 par. 5
expresison
expression

5.4.1 par. 3
We observe that selection
Selection

6.1.1 par. 3
has therefore took on
has therefore taken on [or therefore took on]

6.1.2 par. 1
AMerican Physical Society
American Physical Society

, the Institute
, and the Institute

6.1.2 par. 2
the the
the

assignement
assignment

6.1.2 par. 3
commisioning
commissioning

is hoped with
is hoped for within

6.1.3 par. 3
"...For the XML world with its use of documents
     well-formedness is to be sufficient for the examination
     of a particular one, which does not require validation
     against a DTD, where character entities would be found
     declared."
[This sentence confused me. Not sure, but could be:]
     For the XML world, which does not require
     validation against a DTD where character entities would be
     declared, well-formedness is sufficient for the
     examination of a particular document.

<code class="error">mchar</code>
[As far as I can see, mchar is not an error, and the red could be 
confused with the bad examples in red in chapter 4. What about:]
<code>mchar</code>

6.1.4 par. 2
line-breaking, In
line-breaking. In

6.1.5 par. 1
As before we can only reiterate that
[omit]

Home Page of the W3C Math WG
[needs a link to http://www.w3.org/Math/]

6.1.5 par. 4
completley
completely

6.1.6 par. 1
There used also the be
There also used to be

so have been removed
so they have been removed

6.1.7
upper-case preceding lower-case
uppercase preceding lowercase

The Unicode point points
The Unicode points

eventaully
eventually

6.1.8.1 par. 1
ISO have
ISO has

6.1.8.1 par. 2
"...Such a set of fonts is under development in more than one
     context. The MathML Working Group is engaged in the
     effort of ensuring that such fonts will be readily
     publicly available."
[This was explained in part in 6.1.2; omit or add to a Fonts section.]

7. par. 1 and 7.1 par. 2
[HTML4.0]
[HTML4] [or 4.01]

7. par. 5
working group
Working Group

7.1 par. 3
"...While some popular user agents also support inclusion of
     MathML directly in HTML 4 as "XML data islands," the view
     point we adopt here is that this is a transitional
     strategy, and we don't elaborate on it."
[No "we". Maybe:]
     While some popular user agents also support inclusion of
     MathML directly in HTML 4 as "XML data islands," this is
     a transitional strategy.

7.1.1 par. 8
math' element
math element [or `math' element]

to element
to an element

7.1.1.2 par. 1
recommendations
Recommendations

7.1.1.2 par. 2
"...After surveying a number of user agents and other
     MathML-aware software applications, we offer the
     following suggestions."
[Omit "we"; I think you can skip the sentence.]

7.1.2 - mode
standard CSS2 `display' property
[CSS2 is not a standard, far as I know. You could just say:]
CSS2 `display' property

7.1.3 par. 7
consult the W3C Metadata Activity
[needs a link to http://www.w3.org/Metadata/]

7.1.4 par. 1
they are problems for XML applications in XHTML
[Not sure here, but I think you mean:]
they are problems for XML applications and XHTML

7.2.1 par. 7
makes is possible
makes it possible

7.2.1.1 par. 1
We now clarify the relation between deprecated features and MathML 
2.0 compliance.
To clarify the relation between deprecated features and MathML 2.0 compliance:

7.2.3 par. 3
mean time
meantime

7.2.3 par. 6
loop-hole
loophole

"...We trust both authors and applications will use
     non-standard attributes judiciously."
[As nice as this sounds, to remove the "we" it could say, for example:]
     Authors and applications should use
     non-standard attributes judiciously.

7.3 par. 2
working group
Working Group

7.3.1. par. 2
Macros has
Macros have

8.1.1.1 par. 4
However, we feel that introducing
Introducing

8.1.1.2 par. 1
Again, however, we feel that it would be
Again, it would be

A. par. 2
Normally.
Normally,

"...file. (In contrast to the standalone version of the
     MathML DTD which references several files for entity
     declarations etc."
[4 small changes:]
     file (in contrast to the standalone version of the
     MathML DTD which references several files for entity
     declarations etc.).

A. par. 5
whitespace whitespace
whitespace

A. last par. of the introduction
Namespace prefixes
namespace prefixes [It's not a proper noun or being used as a title.]

C. TOC, and C.2.10 heading
[Not sure, but I believe "lineary" as in "Lineary Algebra" is 
obsolete usage and could read "C.2.10 Linear Algebra".]

C.1 par. 3 list item 1
liturature
literature

C.1 par. 3 list item 3
recommendation
Recommendation

C.1 par. 3 list item 3 also needs an ending period inside the closing 
parenthesis.

C.1 last par.
from the real numbers to the real numbers
[Sorry I didn't understand that phrase.]

C.1.2 - punctuation
refered
referred

C.1.2 - signature
to type
to a type

on the right..
on the right.

C.2.2.3
Declare
declare

C.2.2.7
to place a conditions on a bound
variables.
[Not sure here but could be:]
to place a condition on a bound
variable.

C.2.2.9
is a the expression
is the expression

C.2.2.10
etc.  .
etc.

[In C.2.5.1, C.2.5.2 and C.2.5.3, description runs out the right side 
of a 640x480 window. Maybe could be rewrapped. Also true for C.2.8 
Reference elements.]

C.2.7.3
a domains
domains [or a domain]

E.1.3 and E.1.4
heirarchy
hierarchy

E.1.3.3
We include under the heading of Presentation Container Elements interfaces
Included under the heading of Presentation Container Elements are interfaces

E.1.3.4 Interface MathMLMultiScriptsElement - insertSuperScriptBefore
chld
child

E.1.3.4 Interface MathMLTableElement - columnwidth
veryverythickmathspace.
veryverythickmathspace.)

E.1.3.4 Interface MathMLTableRowElement and
E.1.3.4 Interface MathMLLabeledRowElement and
E.1.4.1 Interface MathMLContentToken and
E.1.4.2 Interface MathMLContentContainer
[Emphasized text can be marked up with em or strong rather than i. 
For example:]
     <em>Note that this does not include the label if this is a
     <code>MathMLLabeledRowElement</code>!</em>

E.1.4.2 Interface MathMLContentContainer - getArgument Return Value
index-thargument
index-th argument
[Throughout Appendix E, indexth and index-th appear. Maybe pick one 
and make them all match.]

E.1.4.2 Interface MathMLsetElement - type
norml
normal

F. par. 1
organisations
organizations

F. - Axis
etcetera
et cetera [or etc.]

F. - DSSSL
method of specify
method of specifying

F. - Instance of MathML
toplevel
top level

F. - Operator, an mo element
elementmo
element mo

F. - Parsed character data (PCDATA)
recognised
recognized

G. - 2d to last line
Softquad
SoftQuad

I. Bray1998
Sperberg-Mcqueen
Sperberg-McQueen

I. HTML 4.0
[Could be updated to HTML 4.01 and use this HTML:]
"<a href="http://www.w3.org/TR/1999/REC-html401-19991224">
HTML 4.01 Recommendation</a>", D. Raggett, A. Le Hors, and I. Jacobs, eds.,
17 December 1997, revised 24 April 1998, revised 24 December 1999. This
version of the HTML 4.01 Recommendation is
http://www.w3.org/TR/1998/REC-html40-19980424.
The <a href="http://www.w3.org/TR/html4">latest version of HTML 4</a>
is available at http://www.w3.org/TR/html4.

I. XSLT
(editor)
(editor),

I. from Namespaces on
[For each of these 8 references, there could be a comma after the 
author or editor, and a comma after the title.]

I. DOM
Philippe Le H?ret
Philippe Le H&eacute;garet

I. XMLSchemas
Maloney(authors)
Maloney (authors)

I. from XLink on (11 occurrences)
World-Wide Web Consortium
World Wide Web Consortium


[1] http://www.w3.org/TR/2000/WD-MathML2-20000328/

Best wishes for your project,
-- 
Susan Lesch
Intern, W3C

Received on Saturday, 29 April 2000 22:30:40 UTC