- From: Susan Lesch <lesch@w3.org>
- Date: Sat, 6 Sep 2003 13:11:45 -0700
- To: www-math@w3.org
Hello, These are minor editorial comments for your MathML Version 2.0 second edition Proposed Edited Recommendation [1]. It looks great. Due to time constraints I used the diff marked files; thanks for providing them. Please spell out 2nd to "Second" Edition globally. The other W3C second edition specs, XHTML, DOM, PNG and XML all do and it would be best to not invent a new W3C convention. In all chapters, div minitoc could use padding: 0.3em or so. In the document head, a line break between previous versions would be easier to read than a space. Images need white rather than transparent background for readers with user style sheets set to light on dark. Status section s/members/Members/ s/last-call/Last Call/ s/During end of that period/During the end of that period/ s/W3C Math Working Group members/W3C Math Working Group participants/ s/MathML 2.0 Specification/MathML 2.0 specification/ Chapter 1 s/[Swanson1979],[Swanson1999]/[Swanson1979], [Swanson1999]/ Chapter 2 s/±, this is equivalent/± this is equivalent/ s/recognise/recognize/ Chapter 3 s/ennumerated/enumerated/ s/whitespace/white space/ s/linebreak/line break/ (except when it's the attribute, I think) "Unicode 3.2 contains" could be "Unicode starting with 3.2 contains" or "Unicode contains" since they're up to 4 now as explained in chapter 6. Chapter 4 s/a ci element, might be/a ci element might be/ s/plus times gcd lcm union intersect/plus, times, gcd, lcm, union, intersect/ (not sure there...?) s/website/Web site/ www.openmath.org should be openmath.example.org (openmath.org may be a known now but the example domains are the only domains IANA reserves) Chapter 5 Generally in CSS "style sheet" is two words, and XSL "stylesheet" is one. Chapter 6 "the home page of the W3C Math Activity should be consulted" could use a link. s/Specification/specification/ Appendix A s/Document Type Definition or Schema/document type definition (DTD) or schema/ s/Schema/schema/ (everywhere except in the title "XML Schema") s/Declaration/declaration/ Appendix B The br-delimited list can be a real list (ul). s/to avoid writing a grammar/to avoid presenting a grammar/ The para starting "equations" can start "Equations" and end in a period. Appendix C Elements seem to be missing their code markup (same for some occurrences of definitionURL). Appendix G s/Cascading Style Sheet/Cascading Style Sheets language (CSS) style sheet/ or CSS (Cascading Style Sheets) style sheet. Appendix I The participants in a Working Group are called participants, not members, to differentiate from W3C Members. So: s/Members of the Working Group/Participants in the Working Group/ s/Earlier active members/Earlier active participants/ Also "www-math mailing list" could use a link. s/spear-headed/spearheaded/ Appendix K Reference titles should be the link. The Manual of Style shows an example reference: http://www.w3.org/2001/06/manual/#References [1] http://www.w3.org/TR/2003/PER-MathML2-20030804/ Best wishes for your project, -- Susan Lesch http://www.w3.org/People/Lesch/ mailto:lesch@w3.org tel:+1.858.483.4819 World Wide Web Consortium (W3C) http://www.w3.org/
Received on Saturday, 6 September 2003 16:11:48 UTC