Editorial comments on webarch 20030326

Abstract: might want to say "the effect is that of an efficient, 
scaleable shared information space.

End of 1.1, talks about "an HTML file".  File is the wrong word, I would 
say "document".

2. "participants in W3C groups."  Do you mean "Activities"?

2. "The authors have made every effort to keep this document terse but 
illustrate its contents with examples."

2. in discussion of findings is awkward. Suggest "... will elaborate on 
the guidance here, with background, motivation, and additional examples."

2.1 I'm not sure the paragraph about this stuff conflicting with current 
practice really adds anything useful.

3. last para before 3.1 - the ref to IRIs should be beefed up, saying 
the community approves of this work.

3.1 We should ref 2396#section 6 up front, not my half-cooked draft 
later on.

3.1 We're going to have to decide how we present the still-open issues 
as we move toward publication, e.g. the stuff at the end of 3.1.

3.2 Just before the Good Practice, "since a huge range of 
already-deployed software is expected..."

3.2 I'm not sure the suggested language (in the note at the end) about 
the authority component is worthwhile putting in here.

3.3 The exmample of the #-fragment on the email address: it's meanless 
both de jure (becaues RFCXXXX provides no semantic) and de facto 
(because deployed software doesn't do anything).

3.4.1 first <li> in the <ol>, should be "defines" not "define"

3.4.4 Is it OK to have an example from yahoo.com not example.com?  I'm 
OK with it as long as we provide a date-stamp saying when it worked.

3.4.4 Last para, do we want to use the word "Webmasters".  We mean 
anyone who wants to publish Web Resources.

4. first <li> in the <ol>.  I suggest

"1. Electronic data expressed in one ore more formats..."

5. "it is primarily used", missing a 'd'




-- 
Cheers, Tim Bray
         (ongoing fragmented essay: http://www.tbray.org/ongoing/)

Received on Friday, 30 May 2003 16:15:15 UTC