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Business Presentation

Date: Fri, 14 Mar 2008 17:42:16 -0400
To: jeff.pollock@oracle.com
Cc: public-sweo-ig@w3.org
Message-ID: <OFC35713F2.1D1EB6EA-ON8525740C.0072F312-8525740C.00773A1C@EliLilly.lilly.com>

Hi Jeff,

You've done a great job of putting these slides together. :-)

I have a few comments that directly relate to individual slides:
Slide 1. SWEO is an 'Interest Group' rather than a 'Working Group'. I'm not
convinced that we need 'Intended for Buyers and Technology Approvers of
Enterprise Software Solutions'. When Ivan converts the material to his
template, we could include the Semantic Web logo on the first slide.
Slide 2. You could add that the Semantic Web also has the capability to
change how you interact with or visualize data.
Slide 3: Maybe the last bullet could be split into 2. That way you'd have a
shorter bullet, and wouldn't need the periods.
Slide 5. The 'to' isn't needed in the title for the slide. Should you also
mention the ability to share data in this slide?
Slide 7. I'm not convinced that 'simplicity' is a 'capability'. Perhaps it
could have its own bullet? I'd prefer it if you are more explicit as to the
sort of 'management' that you mean?
Slide 12 is inconsistent in having a period at the end of one of the

There are a few formatting inconsistencies. E.g. the words in bullets are
capitalized in some slides but not others. Some bullets start with lower
case letters, and others are capitalized. Many of the titles of the slides
are questions, but only some of the titles have question marks.
You reference 'Relational DBs' on slide 3, yet 'RDBMS' on slide 9.

It seems that the slides finish rather abruptly. Could you add a conclusion
slide? Another option would be to move slide 4 (Your Call to Action) to
just before the citations slide.

You were asking for suggestions for images. The only one that is springing
to mind is the web of data image that we used in the brochure. You can take
a look at it at:

I would like it if we could somehow bring out the important of the Semantic
Web to data integration a bit more. Could we emphasize or include some of
these points?
- Maximize the value of information
- Information sharing with ultimate flexibility
- Greater level of future-proofing and re-use
- Data isn't trapped within individual applications

My final thought is that it'd be good if we could make the point that you
can incrementally move to the Semantic Web rather than needing to throw
everything out and starting again. Do you think you could somehow include
that message?

Thanks for all of your help with this.


Received on Friday, 14 March 2008 21:42:55 UTC

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