Re: Request review of prov-dc

Thanks for your feedback, Craig.
Tracker, this is issue 603: https://www.w3.org/2011/prov/track/issues/603
Best,
Daniel

2012/11/22 Craig M Trim <cmtrim@us.ibm.com>

> Hi Paul, et al -
>
> I've performed an initial review, focused entirely on the introduction.
>  It's going to take me longer to go through the rest of the document,
> including the more technical mappings.  I've made enough changes in the
> introduction however, that I felt it worthwhile to send out my changes.  No
> obligation to accept these verbatim; my style is by no means perfect.
>  However, as is often the case in writing, what we write in summary makes a
> better introduction.  I've moved the conclusion up to the beginning, as it
> seemed the clearest way to approach the document.  Likewise, the example
> has been moved toward the end of the document.  By the time the reader
> approaches the example, the terms and expressions used should be much
> clearer (the text provides insight to the example in this case, not the
> other way around).
>
> I'm attaching multiple formats - I originally edited in Word 2003, but
> have an open office writer and PDF version too - something here for
> everyone :)
>
> *(See attached file: PROV-DC revision.doc)**(See attached file: PROV-DC
> revision.pdf)**(See attached file: PROV-DC revision.odt)*
>
>
> -Craig
>
> [image: Inactive hide details for Paul Groth ---11/21/2012 05:40:08
> PM---Hi Simon, Craig, all: Can you go ahead and review prov-dc for]Paul
> Groth ---11/21/2012 05:40:08 PM---Hi Simon, Craig, all: Can you go ahead
> and review prov-dc for release as a first public working
>
> From: Paul Groth <p.t.groth@vu.nl>
> To: Simon Miles <simon.miles@kcl.ac.uk>, Craig M Trim/Costa Mesa/IBM@IBMUS,
>
> Cc: Provenance Working Group WG <public-prov-wg@w3.org>, Daniel Garijo <
> dgarijo@delicias.dia.fi.upm.es>
> Date: 11/21/2012 05:40 PM
> Subject: Request review of prov-dc
> Sent by: pgroth@gmail.com
> ------------------------------
>
>
>
> Hi Simon, Craig, all:
>
> Can you go ahead and review prov-dc for release as a first public working
> draft?
>
> You can find the document here:
>
> *http://dvcs.w3.org/hg/prov/raw-file/839d503bd064/dc-note/Overview.html*<http://dvcs.w3.org/hg/prov/raw-file/839d503bd064/dc-note/Overview.html>
>
> The key question is to see whether the document is ready for release as an
> fpwd.
>
> If it is possible, can you have your review done by Nov. 29?
>
> Anyone else in the working group is also invited to review the document.
>
> Thanks
> Paul
>
>