Re: call for comments on publishing task models spec

I agree with you. Ignacio.
This msg to let you know that GAelle and I will be working all day tomorrow on the introduction document.

On 17 Jul 2012, at 14:17, Ignacio Marin wrote:

> Here we come with CTIC's comments. Most of them are wording and aesthetic issues.
> 
> - Perhaps the document should refer to the "Introduction" and "Glossary" WG Note. We should consider whether to make sure that some of the concepts mentioned in the document are described in the glossary. If so, we may review the document looking for unreferenced terms. One example is Concurrent Task Trees. Although it is defined in the document, perhaps it should also be mentioned in the glossary.
> 
> - The table should have a title preceded by "Table 1" 
> 
> - With regard to Concurrent Task Trees, the terms is mentioned as ConcurTaskTrees and CTT without any relationship established between the three terms.
> 
> - Introduction:
>     - There are three sentences in a row starting with "Task models". Maybe they should be in a single paragraph and use connectors to avoid the repetition.
>     - The third sentence in broken after a comma. 
>     - The last sentence ("The initial proposal is based on the widely known, and internationally adopted ConcurTaskTrees notation, further improvements can be added, if useful.") perhaps should be "The initial proposal is based on the widely adopted ConcurTaskTrees notation. Further variations to this notation may be added in the future, if useful."
> - The fourth, fifth and sixth paragraphs after Table 1 may be more legible by using bullets instead of writing in a single paragraph with a lot of text between brackets. For instance, the XML Schema Definition section uses bullets to enumerate and it seems more readable to us.
> - The sentence "A precondition (which can occur...") starting the third paragraph after Figure 1 is hard to read. A try to improve the wording: "A precondition is an instance of the ConditionGroup class, which contains a number of operands and an operator. It can occur or not, associated to a specific task, as suggested by the 0..1 multiplicity in Figure 1" 
> - Most of the occurrences of the adjective "following" are not accompanied by a name.
> 
> Our main concern is that the main audience for W3C technical documents (perhaps, web developers, although we have stated that MBUI applies to other technological spaces) may feel confused when reading this document, if it is released before the Introduction and Glossary documents. In our opinion, it is also important to use an example to guide developers through the whole  MBUI process. Maybe reusing the car rental example in all our documents (mainly, Task Models and Abstract UI) in a consistent way would be important.
> 
> Best regards,
> 
> Cristina, Javier and Nacho
> 
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Ignacio Marín Prendes
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> 
> 
> 2012/7/16 Dave Raggett <dsr@w3.org>
> This is a call for comments on publishing the following document as a
> First Public Working Draft:
> 
>   http://www.w3.org/2011/mbui/drafts/task-models/
> 
> My aim is to ask for a formal resolution in this week's MBUI telecon to
> publish the document.
> 
> p.s. this was derived from the Google Doc, although it took quite a bit
> of work!
> --
> Dave Raggett <dsr@w3.org> http://www.w3.org/People/Raggett
> 
> 
> 

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Received on Thursday, 19 July 2012 13:31:48 UTC