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Suggestion for Introduction

From: Sharron Rush <srush@knowbility.org>
Date: Sat, 18 Apr 2009 11:58:12 -0500
Message-ID: <49EA06A4.10503@knowbility.org>
To: public-egov-ig@w3.org

Hello editors,

In going through the wiki, I find a Pending Use Case around Plain 
Language.  That was the point I tried to make in my first message - I 
think we need to model that.  Rachel, can I support you in that work in 
any way?

But as a start, here is a suggestion for the Introduction.  I am a 
strong advocate for introductory text that simply lays the foundation 
and lets readers know what to expect.  I believe that we may want to 
include one short paragraph (an example is suggested below, but please 
feel free to reject or rewrite) and move all the other explanatory text 
into the Background section. 

_Introduction:_

The mission of the e-Government Interest group is to provide a forum and 
leadership around the issue of how to improve access to government 
through better use of the Web and to achieve better government 
transparency using open Web standards.  We have pursued the mission in 
year 1 by setting these goals for the group:

1.      Explore the benefits and challenges for both citizens and their 
governments of establishing effective, transparent and inclusive two-way 
electronic communication and participatory systems of governing.  

2.      Define the critical links that are needed between standards 
bodies and government entities to help citizens and governments meet the 
challenges and realize the benefits.  

3.      Develop a flexible list of concerns and deliverables to help 
build cooperative relationships that lead to productive next steps.

To meet these goals, the group worked within three Task Forces: Usage of 
Web Standards, Transparency and Participation, and Seamless Integration 
of Data.  The following document describes our findings.


...so, what do you think?  If there is another avenue that you would 
rather I use for suggestions of this kind, please let me know.  And 
thanks for considering!

Best,
Sharron
Received on Saturday, 18 April 2009 16:58:58 GMT

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