editorial suggestions Re: LC-1572 Follow on from Gilman-14 and Gilman-15

The text the way it presently stands says a correct thing.  I am 
suggesting a slight
re-flow of the prose to make this correct meaning more obvious to the 
casual reader.

At 2:38 PM +0000 29 01 2007, Rhys Lewis wrote:
>Hello Al,
>
>Thanks again for your comments on the DISelect Last call.
>
>In your response to the disposition of comments for Gilman-14 & 
>15 [1], you indicated that there was still a remaining ambiguity in 
>the text. Specifically, the description did not explicitly state 
>whether the contents of the expr attribute appeared in the result 
>infoset.
>
>DIWG agrees with this comment and has made a number of modifications 
>to the DISelect document as a result.
>
>The second paragraph in section 4.2 The expr Attribute now reads:
>
>"The DISelect processor evaluates the expression defined by the expr 
>attribute. If the result is a 
><file://finch/shared/Standards/diwg/ExtensionMarkup/Documents/di-selection/2007-01-31/WD-cselection-20070131.html#def-boolean>boolean 
>value of true, the element that contains the attribute and all of 
>its descendents appear in the result infoset. If it has a value of 
>false, the element and its descendents are omitted from the result 
>infoset. The expr attribute itself does not appear in the result 
>infoset."

<draft
class="rewrite proposed">

"The DISelect processor evaluates the expression defined by the expr
attribute. If the result is a
<file://finch/shared/Standards/diwg/ExtensionMarkup/Documents/di-selection/2007-01-31/WD-cselection-20070131.html#def-boolean>boolean
value of true, the element that contains the attribute and all of its
descendants appear in the result infoset. The expr attribute itself,
however, does not appear in the result infoset. If it has a value of
false, the element and all its descendants are omitted from the result
infoset.
"

</draft>

* change 1

The principal change is to put the "does not appear" sentence one 
sentence earlier in the flow, and
add the ", however," to emphasize the exception.

* change 2

Add 'all'

from "the element and its descendants" to "the element and all its descendants"

* change 3

s/descendents/descendants -- American spelling per W3C style.

>
>The description of each of the elements of DISelect now contains the 
>additional paragraph:
>
>"As described in 
><file://finch/shared/Standards/diwg/ExtensionMarkup/Documents/di-selection/2007-01-31/WD-cselection-20070131.html#sec-processing-model>3Processing 
>Model, neither the element itself nor any of its attributes appears 
>in the result infoset."
>
>The reference is to a section in the existing version of the 
>document that made it clear that DISelect elements and attributes 
>never appear in the result infoset.
>
>I hope you feel that the new text is appropriate. Perhaps you would 
>be able to confirm that by posting to the list?

I both feel that the new text is appropriate and suggest that you 
make the further editorial change above.

Please consider the disposition accepted and use your editorial 
discretion as to whether to accept the reflow suggested above.

Al


>
>
>Very best wishes
>Rhys Lewis
>
>
>[1] 
><http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/public-diselect-editors/2006OctDec/0007.html>http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/public-diselect-editors/2006OctDec/0007.html<http://lists.w3.org/Archives/Public/public-diselect-editors/2006OctDec/0004.html>
><http://www.w3.org/2007/01/MGMoverview>
>
>